[Question #10225] Lapdances

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24 months ago
Good Evening Doctors
I just wanted to know my risks regarding a lapdance visit in the uk.
I was in Birmingham 6 weeks ago for work and went to a strip joint.
I received two lapdance for about 30 mins each.
The first one she was naked apart from her panties but straddled me vigorously and I licked her nipple for a few seconds.
The second one she was completely naked and was particularly aggressive straddling me.
I was fully clothed for the whole period pants and trousers, as I’ve got a bit of a health phobia and some PTSD from a pervious no risk event apparently.
2 weeks after the event I started to develop a sore throat, which has now turned into a post nasal drip and also me kind of full blown viral infection.
I have no fever just pain when I swallow, my neck feels swollen but throat not red, and my lymph nodes are not swollen too, just pain underneath the ears like the parotid gland.
I’m worried some fluid might have got through my trousers and underwear and infected me with HiV.
Terrence Higgins trust told me on the phone it’s no risk.
Also the Poz forum told me it’s no risk, you have to have penetration to have a risk.
But the very well sites says dryhumping is a risk, maybe they mean without clothes on.
I’m quite worried again, stupidly putting myself into anxiety positions again.
Thank you.
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H. Hunter Handsfield, MD
24 months ago
Welcome to the forum. Thanks for your confidence in our services.

Some questions contain enough information in the title the user creates or the first 1-2 sentence of the question. Maybe that is the case here. In the over 10,000 questions on this forum over the years, we have never had an exposure event involving a lap dance that had any significant risk of any STD. So before I read beyond the first line of your question, my guess is that your are at little or no risk.

Now I have read the rest. Guess what? No STD can be transmitted through fabric -- or, even without clothing, by genital-genital contact without penetration. And no STD is transmitted by oral contact with partners' skin anywhere on the body, including breasts and nipples.

So there is no realistic chance at all that your sore throat and nasal drip are due to HIV or any STD from those events. Although such exposure could result in a common viral infection, i.e. common cold, viral pharyngitis, influenza, or Covid, the symptoms occurred too late to be caused by any of these from your lap dance events. If you're worried about early symptoms of HIV infection, they're the wrong symptoms:  HIV doesn't cause nasal congestion or drip and not a likely cause of the pain near your ears. Without fever, enlarged lymph nodes, fever, or skin rash, there is no possibility these symptoms are caused by HIV.

So you should not be at all concerned. I see no need for testing for HIV or any other STD. Please don't worry.

I hope these comments are helpful. Let me know if anything isn't clear.

HHH, MD
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24 months ago
Thank you Dr Handsfield
Your answer has given me some comfort.
Can I ask why such an organization like yourself the Terrence Higgin trust and the experts on the poz forum can be so adamant that is no risk.
They mention that when a woman get excited the lubricanting fluid comes from something called the bartoid gland and this doesn’t contain any viable HIV, so to get an infection you must be penetrating deep inside.
I’ve started to feel a feverish and achey but my temp is very normal.
My sore throat is very unusual and only hurts when I swallow, also lozenges are not helpful.
I’m wondering if it’s to do with my LPR reflux.
If for some reason I do get a rash or fever etc should I test?
I mean the activity I did and am worried about, probably a thousand men do round the world per night.
Many thanks once again.


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H. Hunter Handsfield, MD
24 months ago
"Why so adamant...no risk"? We're not "adamant" -- but there simply are no patients with HIV or other STDs, even in the busiest STD/HIV clinics. whose only risks were such exposures. Just common sense. What would you conclude? And as you have seen, we agree with the Poz forum:  no penetration = no risk for HIV.

Your comment about Bartholin glands and vaginal penetration suggest you're over-searching the web and over-interpreting things you find. These are irrational comments -- Bartholin gland secretions have nothing to do with HIV/STD risk or transmission.

Sorry, but I don't care that your throat symptoms are "unusual". That doesn't mean HIV is the cause!

I don't know what "LPR" reflux means.

\"the activity I did and am worried about, probably a thousand men do round the world per night." Correct. And none of them get HIV.

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24 months ago
Thank you Dr Handsfield for the incredibly fast response, due to this and previous non exposure events I’ve studied  and read about hiv exposures too much.
The reason I mention Bartholin gland is the experts in the poz forum mention it a lot, when it comes to this non penetration exposures.
As it’s my last question would you briefly explain why penetration is so important and why a females liquid is not enough on its own outside the body.
I think that’s the biggest grey point for people like me, some sites say body fluid is a risk but some(experts like yourselves) say not.
Is it solely on the fact you just don’t see this in the clinics or is there a scientific explanation as well.
Thank you for all your help
It’s an Amazing service for people like myself.



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H. Hunter Handsfield, MD
24 months ago
Bartholin gland is not a particularly significant or important source of HIVi infected genital fluids women. I can't otherwise comment on what was said on Poz except to suspect it was a non-professional source.

The point you do not understand about HIV transmission, I suspect, is your inherent assumption that "just one virus" (or some small amount) can transmit infection. Not true. This isn't a "gray zone" at all. It takes contact of millions or perhaps billions of viruses with particular types of cells -- which are internal, not on skin or mucous membrane surfaces -- for infection to take hold. If a male has untreated HIV and ejaculates in the vagina of an infected woman (billions of HIV deep inside her body), there is roughly one chance in a thousand she will be infected. What can it possibly be, then, with external exposure to far smaller amounts of virus?

That concludes this thread. I'm glad we've been helpful; I appreciate the thanks!
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