Good afternoon. For context, I'm a 33 year old male. I've recently met someone (another male), and they make me very happy. After deciding to be in a committed relationship, we had unprotected sex (we have both tested negative for other STI). Back at the end of 2022, I was diagnosed with genital warts, and worked to get rid of them through 2023. My last dermatologist visit was toward the end of 2023, and he did not notice any warts at all (and in fact, some normal skin stuff that I thought could be warts, he said didn't look like anything at all). My dermatologist also said that there's no need to send biopsies for incredibly small things that I think "might" be GW, as he doesn't believe there would be enough viral load to transmit anything anyway. Anyway, I had two questions. First, is my dermatologist correct that there's no need to try to self-diagnose myself and worry about the smallest things (I've been guilty of this in the past, but have gotten much better since my last visit with him)? Should I be worried about transmitting HPV to my new partner? I did not tell them about my previous infection, as I had read somewhere else that it is not recommended at all to disclose. But I do care a lot about them. I suppose my fear is that even though it doesn't "look" like there is anything present, there's still a chance that I could spread something to them, or that perhaps I "missed" something. That might be silly, as I've read that after a certain amount of time there's no need to worry. Perhaps if I don't notice anything "warty" from just taking a shower, I should be good? My partner has certainly had unprotected sex with other partners before me, and so I assume since 90% of sexually active people get genital HPV, he may already be immune, but there is a bit of anxiety there.

Welcome back to the forum -- but I doubt I can help very much. You recognize that your concerns about HPV and warts amount to an obsession -- and like most obsessions, your concerns are unwarranted and mostly irrational (by which I mean emotionally as opposed to intellectually based).

having genital HPV is a normal, expected consequence of having sex. At least 90% of all people have sexually acquired HPV at one time or another; most of us have more than one HPV infection during our lives. Happily, the large majority of infections cause no disease at all, and the most common consequence is genital warts and, in women, abnormal Pap smears that do not progress to cancer.

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