I need help bad! I am a male in his early 30's who has a long term female partner and I don't not want to infect her. Here is my situation. I drunkenly received oral sex on me from someone I found on the Internet. She definitely gets around and has multiple partners also from the Internet.  I had no open skin that I know of and did ejaculate when I received oral. This encounter happened about 13 days ago. I got tested for gonorrea and clahmydia twice which came back normal (last time tested was after 9 days from potential exposure). It's to early to be tested for herpes. I have a few questions. I'm on day 13 and have nothing noticeable on my genitals, I see some small red bumps forming but no blisters yet. I'm assuming these bumps are the beginning though but they don't hurt yet and just noticed them this morning. Is this herpes forming? Also I read that more often then not you won't have symptoms so if I do have it without symptoms will I pass it to another partner? I'm emotionally a mess and very concerned. When am I in the clear or what do I need to look out for with herpes? Worth mentioning, I have no idea if she had open sores but I'm assuming the worst. Would I definitely have symptoms from my first exposure and when would they happen?

Let me ask you a very simple question - have you ever in your life had a cold sore on your lip or in your nose?  The reason I ask is that the type of herpes one might get receiving oral sex is HSV 1, the cause of cold sores.  Though a person could have HSV 2 orally, it is not common at all and when it is oral, it is rarely active to transmit to another person (you).  If your contact was 13 days ago, your red bumps are unlikely to be HSV.  Most people who acquire herpes with symptoms will display symptoms within 2 - 10 days.  Keep an eye on the red bumps and see if they develop into anything like blisters.  If they do, go right in and have them evaluated, but honestly, I would be surprised if they change or become blisters. 

Terri
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Thank you for the response. So my main concern should be HSV-1? Does HSV-1 also infect the genital area? That's my biggest concern is getting it there and then transmitting it to someone else. I also read online you could get a different strain of HSV-1 from a new exposure which would have symptoms. Is that true?  I have had cold sores, usually on my gums I always thought it was from food, drinks, sugar, something like that.... Any other concerns I should have from this encounter?

Cold sores and canker sores inside your mouth are different - canker sores, as I think you are describing them, are not caused by herpes.  While it is possible to get more than one strain of HSV 1, is isn't likely and probably has no clinical implications - that is, if you already have HSV 1 infection, getting another one doesn't make you more or less infectious to others.  However, given all of that, I still think your risk of acquiring HSV 1 is low - you've had no symptoms, enough time has passed that I think you would have already.  The thing about testing is this - if you test in say 8-12 weeks, and you are positive for HSV 1 antibody, this doesn't mean that you acquired HSV 1 at this encounter - you could have had it for years, acquired it as a child orally from an adult kissing you with a cold sore and you may or may not have ever had a cold sore on your lip.  In your situation, I'm not at all clear that testing for herpes will be helpful

Terri
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Following up from my last question.  At day 14  after potential exposure to herpes from unprotected oral I had no real symptoms. I had some minor irritation/tiny tiny bumps on the head of my penis (not painful, just visible by the eye).  Based on no real symptoms and being low risk I felt it was safe to resume unprotected sex with my partner. Afterwards I examined myself and where the bumps were on the head were raised, more pronounced, red, bumpy, blister like and in a small group. It looked like skin irritation which I had never seen before. How concerned do I need to be with this? Is this herpes? I'm now at day 16 post exposure.

Do you mean at 14 day days post POSSIBLE exposure? We can't be certain you were even exposed.  But blistery lesions on the head of the penis are certainly concerning.  I would very strongly encourage you to have these blister like lesions evaluated today - the sooner the better.  I can't have any real idea about whether these might be herpes or not but I think you should definitely have them checked out, OK?

Terri
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Yes, 14/15 days post POSSIBLE exposure.  I'm now at 16 days.  I should mention, I noticed them only when erect and after intercourse.  They weren't like blisters that were filled with pus or aanything and they went away when I wasn't erect.  It was more like bumps and a little redness and it went away.  Right now its just like teeny, tiny dots that you have to look hard to see on the head.  I showed my partner when I was erect but she said she couldn't really see anything but I noticed because I was looking harder.

If she couldn't see anything, then my guess is that you may be just noticing bumps that might have been there previously that you had no reason to focus upon, do you think that could be?  When you said blisters, I got worried, but not so much now.

Terri
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