Two weeks ago I had a sexual encounter with a male I had been with once before. He’s an older professional and told me he is on Prep and is tested every three months as part of taking Prep. We only engaged in oral sex and mutual masturbation. This was the first time I’ve performed oral on a man. I performed oral on him for a few minutes and then we both masturbated to completion. A few days ago I noticed a small, irritated bump on my tongue (very small). I believe I recall accidentally biting my tongue during eating, and I’m wondering if it’s just a result of that. It by no means looks like a cancre I’ve seen online. Nor did I see anything on my partner’s penis that looked like a cancre at all, and I think I would have noticed — he was shaved and looked perfectly clean. I’m married and obviously don’t want to accidentally pass anything to my wife, so I just wanted to get your opinion. I’m of the opinion that is probably nothing, but just wanted to see what you think. I do believe my partner is very careful. Thanks!

In other words, I can confirm your own judgments:  there was no significant risk of syphilis or HIV, or any other STI, from the exposure described. In the future, you can expect similar responses on your risk from sex with other men, until you move to significantly risk exposures -- i.e. anal sex. Without anal sex, you will not likely to be at risk of HIV, syphilis, or any other STI from sex with men. I encourage you to continue to discuss STI/HIV status with prospective partners, but so far you haven't been at risk at all. In the future, it should be necessary to ask us about each and every such contact you have.

I hope these commetns are helpful. Let me know if anything isn't clear.

HHH, MD

Since I have the opportunity to ask follow up questions., I’ll do so and then let you get on with more important work. First, I would guess that a chancre would be easy to recognize, correct? Like it would most likely be obvious that it was something out of the ordinary (not suggesting my little bump of the tongue is at all), correct?

How likely is it to contract syphillis from receptive oral sex? Again, just asking to gain a little knowledge about syphillis and how it can be contracted. Again, I would guess that if there wasn’t the presence of a visible sore, syphillis would not be on the table.

Again, thanks, and I promise not to bother you with further questions or follow ups. I definitely understand where you are coming from!

Your several comments, both in your earlier threads and this one, overemphasize symptoms. Presence or absence of visible lesions in a partner is rarely helpful in predicting STI risk. In addition, anxious person tend to be overly sensitive to minor body sensations, aches, pains, and everyday skin lesions which for the most part are meaningless. Rather than looking for or worrying about symptoms, it's much more effective to choose partners with care, pursue safe sex practices, and if at significant risk, get tested. Do not rely on symptoms either to predict risk or, for minor symptoms in yourself, to judge whether or not you are infected.

That completes the two follow-ups included with each question and so ends this thread. I hope the discussion has been helpful. Please note the forum policy against repeated questions on the same topic. This should be your last about such low risk sorts of sexual exposures. Thanks for your understanding. Best wishes and stay safe.