I had herpes diagnosed four years ago completely forgot about it got in a relationship became a monogamous relationship. I zipper my cock which caused an outbreak. I had oral and anal sex with my gay partner, and he freaked out one night because he had little white bumps in his, anal ass area also had other symptoms like a headache and sickness overall that led to a lot of mistrust but we’re past that I’m convinced that he should find out if he has the virus because we had oral and anal sex about 50 times before the outbreak over the course of about 3 1/2 months  And we had sex during the break and I’d like him to get tested because I want to find out if he has it because I’ve been led to believe that we both have it continually behavior of no oral sex and wearing a condom for anal sex, which just isn’t working for me so can you give me your opinion on whether or not he is infected if we had sex at least 30 times oral and anal when I had no signs and then twice when I did have a sore on my penis 

Little white bumps are not very specific, I'm afraid.  Were they painful ulcerations?  How long did they last?  Having sex during an outbreak is indeed risky, no question about it.  But without more information, it's almost impossible to know if he is infected or not.  He could do an IgG test for HSV 2, and if it is negative, that's a good sign, but if it is done too early since the infection, it could be a false negative result.  A test done 8 weeks after the encounter would be quite a good time to wait.  If positive, we would want to know the number associated with the positive result.  If he did the test, I would be happy to review the results and let you know how likely a false positive might be.---

There were about five little white pimples deep inside his anal area. He said they were extremely painful. They really only lasted about three or four days during that time. He felt very sick and the fatigue was the one thing I remember for sure but yes, they were painful and I saw them they were Within about a 1 inch diameter 

well, given that you were having an outbreak at the time and the sex was unprotected and they were painful and white, and he had some systemic symptoms, herpes is a reasonable explanation.  A swab test would have been appropriate to make that diagnosis.---