[Question #11447] HPV Guilt
14 months ago
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Hello,
In my prior question I discussed how I ripped off a hand wart and then showered, which HHH considered to be a very unlikely way to auto inoculate. However, since around that time I have had itching/burning in my genital region (starting in 2017). Despite that, I remained sexually active with my then-partner even though I was suspicious as to whether or not I infected myself (or she infected me? She was my first). We were very rarely sexually active due to my fear of my hand warts spreading, but now I fear that I infected her and she'll surely develop health problems like throat cancer down the line, which I had no idea about back then (I was 20 and didn't know much about HPV other than it causes warts and is ubiquitous). Fast forward to my second partner (2023), prior to us engaging in sex, I told her that I think I may have GW. So, I got examined by a dermatologist/MD who said I don't have any warts. I also did a blood panel that was negative for everything else. So, we continued and had sex despite my symptoms. We had oral once (no ejac.) and protected intercourse 10 times. I feel extremely guilty for having sex with my partners despite my suspicions, and it is debilitating. I'd like to hear your thoughts--is this rational? Even if I had HPV in these cases, would it be the end of the world like I'm making it out to be?
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Edward W. Hook M.D.
14 months ago
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Welcome back to the Forum although I have to say that I'm saddened that you continue to focus on the negligible risk that you have HPV which, even in the unlikely circumstance that you have it, is an innocuos problem readily managed by routine reproductive health care. You are vaccinated against HPV which not only protects against future infections but may enhance resolution of existing infections (if you ever had one), you have been examined by trained professionals who see no evidence of infection and your symptoms are in no way suggestive of HPV (or any other STI). Your guilt and level of concern is not normal nor, to use your term, "rational". Further the fact that you describe high levels of concerns for years and have returned to the Forum despite Dr. Handsfield's reassurances (all of which I completely agree with) suggests that you are devoting high levels of emotional energy to unwarranted concerns which may well be impacting your relationships with others. My sincere and heartfelt advice is for you to seek professional counseling to address why you have this level of concern and how to manage it. I say this entirely out of concern for you, for your mental health, and your romantic relationships with others. EWH---
14 months ago
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Dr. Hook, thanks for your reply. I have since started receiving counseling, and have been meeting with my pastor. The reason I’m so nervous is I have hundreds of lesions on my penile shaft and scrotum that sometimes itch that have been routinely diagnosed as fordyce spots by MDs, but it still makes me nervous. Itching has also spread to my perianal and anal regions off and on, from which the cause is unknown. I also have the aforementioned urethral bump/lesion that I have had looked at, but have been told it’s not a wart. I have taken a urine PCR test that came back negative for all high-risk HPV types. My biggest fear is that I transmitted oral warts to my partners, but my understanding is that oral warts are very rare—is that correct? I never wanted to harm anyone and it scares me that I may have. Thanks again for your time.
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Edward W. Hook M.D.
14 months ago
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You are unnecessarily concerned- Fordyce spots do not represent a risk for acquisition of HPV or other STI. The HPV types which cause visible warts rarely infect the oral cavity.
In addition to seeing your pastor, I repeat my advice to seek the assistance of a trained mental health professional. EWH
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14 months ago
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Dr. Hook,
Thanks again for your reply. I have indeed started seeing a licensed counselor, which has helped a bit. I guess my biggest fear is misdiagnosis since no biopsies were performed (I have asked, but derms have said it is not necessary, so I’ve only had visual exams). So, my biggest question is, in the (hypothetical) case that I did indeed have warts during these encounters, would it be as big of a deal as I’m making it out to be? I have only been sexually active with those two partners. Thanks.
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Edward W. Hook M.D.
14 months ago
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Your level of unwarranted paranoia is very concerning. You have been assured by trained professionals that you do not have HPV however, you cannot leave it alone. Further is already explained by both Dr. Handsfield and myself, if you happen to be infected by HPV, it would be a no meaningful danger to you or future sex partners None at all. !!!!!
You need to move on. This thread will now be closed. Should you return to the forum with further anxiety-driven questions related to your fears of HPV you will not receive a response and the thread will be closed without return of your posting fee. Please, for your own sake, work with your counselor. EWH.
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