[Question #12524] Sex while sleeping

7 months ago

Hi doctor, thanks for the wonderful job you are doing here. I have a stupid question. Last weekend, me & my female when clubbing. She was drunk. I drank too but not drunk. Ended up carrying her to her room. I slept in the same room with her but different bed. Next day in the morning when I woke up, she already awake. Here is my stupid questions:

1) I have this irrational fear bout HIV until I nvr had sex outside of my marriage. Is it possible for my female friend to have sex with me without im aware/wake up?

2) if she really did, I would have wake up right?

3) is it physically possible for a guy to sleep while a girl having sex with him?

She is an open minded and sexually active. When I asked whether she did anything yesterday night, she just laughed and went. I’m also feel shy to keep asking her.

I’m really sorry for asking this. Mentally I’m very down after this incident and avoiding my wife.

H. Hunter Handsfield, MD

7 months ago

Welcome back to the forum. You have previously mentioned your "irrational fear of HIV". Based on both your previous two question a couple years ago and these, I have to agree!

Unfortunately, I really can't help very much with these questions. They relate not to HIV or other STDs but to sexual function, wakefulness, etc -- definitely not our expertise. So my reply is brief.

1-3) Assuming you were not very drunk, I cannot imagine having sex without waking up and being aware of it. To use your own words, I doubt this is "physically possible".

I also see no reason at all to disbelieve your friend -- but this too is a psychological issue, nothing to do with HIV. And certainly no reason to fear HIV or to not have unprotected sex with your wife. (And by the way, even if you had had intercourse with your female friend, presumably you have no reason to suspect she has HIV or you would have said something about it.)

I hope these comments are a little bit helpful.

HHH, MD

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6 months ago

Hi doctor,

I truly understand your point. However I decided to test to calm be down. I did HIV -1 RNA on 24th day, result not detected. And alere hiv combo 1 & 2 rapid test on 35th day, result negative. I was happy. However on 36th day, I was down with high fever and cough. Took medicine, and the fever was gone in 2 days, and still having cough. Can it be ARS? How bout my 2 test, is it conclusive? I know it’s almost conclusive for HIV 1. How bout HIV 2? I’m from Malaysia.

H. Hunter Handsfield, MD

6 months ago

Wow. You misunderstand EVERYTHING! First, it is not possible to have symptoms caused by HIV and to have tested negative: tests ALWAYS are positive when symptoms are due to HIV. Second, ARS symptoms usually start 8-10 days after infection, rare after 2 weeks, and 5 weeks (36 days) is very unlikely. Third, your symptoms don't fit with HIV/ARS; it does not cause cough, and symptoms cannot clear in a couple of days -- ARS always last 1-2 weeks (with or without treatment). Fourth, it's the middle of cold/flu/covid season; and even in non-seasonal times, these are far more common than ARS even in people at high risk for HIV. Of course one of these (cold, influenza, covid) is what you have. Stop your compulsive unneeded testing for HIV; the ones you have had already are conclusive proof that neither HIV1 nor HIV2 caused your symptoms.---
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