I am recently widowed & have started dating. I asked a particularly special gentleman to get tested for STIs so that we could proceed with a sexual relationship & the results for Herpes I came back "Abnormal", and all other results were "Normal." I tested as well, and all results came back "Normal." He has never has any symptoms, or cold sores, and was caught off guard by the positive result. Neither of us has a history of STIs, but we are older, we have both had multiple partners over the course of our life, and I have a friend who teaches nursing that said every partner should be tested before there is anything sexual from casual kissing to intercourse. My previous partners were tested prior to any sexual contact. We are devastated not knowing how to move forward. The tests were ordered through STDCheck.com where they state they use a CLIA blood test. Can this be a false positive if he has never had any symptoms?

What lab did the test?  Are you saying that his result was HSV 1 positive?  About half the US adult population is positive for HSV 1, very common indeed.  And as the population is older, the number increases.  Testing for herpes is not recommended due to the high rate of false positives, more for HSV 2 than HSV 1.  Your nurse friend is incorrect and she would benefit from reading the CDC guidelines on this topic.  Without any symptoms orally or genitally, we cannot know where this fellow's infection is but far more likely to be oral than genital.  And it could be false positive yes,---

I am not sure which lab he chose to use, it was ordered through stdcheck.com, and stdcheck.com says that "Abnormal" indicates he has the herpes virus. Is there a way for us to proceed safely with a sexual relationship or what would be recommended as next steps?

On the test results it says Test Herpes I | Status "Abnormal", which I am assuming is HSV 1, and stdcheck.com said that indicates he has the herpes virus. Is there a was for us to proceed safely with a sexual relationship or what would be recommended as next steps?

If this is a positive for HSV 1, it would be good to know if he has ever in his entire life had a cold sore on his lip or in his nose.  If yes, then it is oral.  If no, which you indicated, and he has received oral sex, we cannot know if his infection is oral or genital.  he could take a daily antiviral medicine to reduce the risk of transmission to you.  Also, the IgG test that you had done misses HSV 1 30% of the time compared to the western blot so that's food for thought as well.  About half the adults in the US test positive for HSV 1---

Thank you, Terri... He has never had any symptoms, and was completely caught off guard, no cold sores on the lip or nose, and never anything genitally. He has received oral sex. Is there a possibility I could pay for a phone consult or virtual consultation?

---