I'll start with some general comments about genital HPV, which partly address your questions. First, even though your partner's Pap results have been "irregular", it seems likely she has had an active infection the entire time you have been together. Second, assuming you have had an average sex life, with at least a few partners over the years, you can be sure you already have been exposed to HPV and probably infected. Around 90% of all sexually aactive people in the US and other industrialized countries acquire HPV at least once. Even with repeated exposure to your partner, and assuming her HPV infection has been active some or most of the time, your relationship with her probably has not raised your low risk of an HPV problem any higher than it already was. Third, after 1.5 yr unprotected sex, you have either been infected with your partner's HPV or are immune to it by now. Either way, probably you'll never have any sort of health problem from it. That's not to say you should ignore the situation; you should keep alert in case of developing any sort of unexplained genital skin growth or other problem. However, the chance you will ever have a health problem from HPV is very low.

To your specific questions:

1) HPV is not a likely cause of genital or anal ulcers. Herpes due to HSV2 remains possible. It sounds like your partner has been evaluated by one or more doctors quite knowledgeable about genital herpes; most would not diagnose Lipschutz ulcers without careful consideration of herpes as the far more common cause. Herpes is the most common cause of otherwise unexplained genital area ulcers, especially if they come and go from time to time; even with a low level HSV2 blood test, the combination of that result plus anal ulcer indicates herpes as a possible cause. A single PCR test from an ulcer doesn't exclude the diagnosis, especially if done a few days after onset. In any case, your partner's HPV probably is not responsible. I'm not saying she has herpes, but she might consider asking her doctor about additional evaluation for it. That might include another HSV PCR swab test the next time ulcer(s) appear, ideally within a day or two; to repeat the HSV2 blood test; and if the blood test remains weakly positive, then have an HSV Western blot test -- the gold standard for HSV blood testing.

2) Most experts agree, and it is my advice, that partners of people with genital HPV have no obligation to report that fact to future partners -- i.e. to report only their own confirmed infection. Even this isn't always necessary, especially if the infection is in the past and not currently active. 

3) See my opening comments; I think they cover this question. Whether or not the HPV is high risk isn't as important as you might think. Even with the high risk (cancer causing) HPV types, the large majority of infected people do not develop cancer.

I'll ask Terri Warren to take a look at the herpes issues here; perhaps she will have additional advice. In the meantime, I hope these comments are helpful.

HHH, MD