[Question #13492] HPV worries
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2 days ago
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I am a 71 yo male. My wife is 73. When my wife was out of town on September 20, 2025, I made the regrettable decision to visit an asian massage parlor. The masseuse performed unprotected oral sex on me, followed by intercourse with a condom in place that seemed to do its job. Since then, I have had no symptoms. I had testing, collected October 8, 2025, negative rpr, hiv by rna, herpes serology, hepatitis b and c, urine for chlamydia and gonorrhea. Lately I became worried about the possibility of passing a high risk hpv to my wife. I realize there is not readily available testing for men, and my wife is past the age for routine gyn exams and pap smears. I have also read that the unprotected oral route is lower risk than with unprotected intercourse. I have had sexual relations with my wife once, on October 15, 2025. Neither I nor my wife have had the HPV vaccine. I am aware that there are home hpv test kits for women available. I am not quite sure what to do, whether this is low enough risk to let it drop, or get a home test kit and have an awkward discussion with my wife or something else. Thanks for your advice.
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Edward W. Hook M.D.
2 days ago
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Welcome to the Forum. Thanks for your questions. You've done a good job of looking into your risks of STI and have largely ruled out more STIs. To get to the "punch line" first, my advice is to put your worries aside and move forward. Let me tell you some of the reasons I say this:
1. As you point out the risk of acquiring HPV from any single exposure to an infected partner is less than 50%, condoms reduce that risk even further, and as you point out, the likelihood of infection from receipt of oral sex is lower than from vaginal intercourse.
2. If you and/or your wife had other sexual partners in the past, you likely have been infected with HPV and the infection has cleared itself.
3. In the unlikely circumstance that you were infected, most infections clear over time and few (less than 3%) progress
4. Progression is slow, typically taking more than 10 years if progression was going to occur.
5. As you point out, seeking testing or discussing with your wife will be awkward at best
I hope this perspective is helpful. EWH
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2 days ago
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Dr. Hook,
Thanks for your advice.