Over the weekend I attended a festival and took a liking to a girl who was also in attendance (we are both from the UK).

We had both been drinking the entire afternoon and evening and I (stupidly) ended up inviting her back to my apartment.

We did not have intercourse of any kind. However, I did (1) suck her breasts, (2) finger her vagina; and (3) engage in vigorous deep open mouth tongue kissing with her for almost an hour (I do not recall tasting any blood, but cannot say for certain).

I do not know this girl’s HIV status. She did want to have sex, but I never would without a condom. I also believe in having discussions about testing etc. before any intercourse. 

I have read historic posts on the forum and see that breast sucking, fingering and open mouth / deep tongue kissing are also zero risk and that no HIV testing is needed unless there is shared needle use or actual vaginal / anal intercourse. I guess I want to know that this is still the case today even with the posts being from 1+ years ago.

Am I worrying for nothing based on these events?

Thank you in advance.

Nothing has changed for years in our assessment of risks from such exposures. To my knowledge, there have been no known HIV infections acquired by fingering, kissing or oral-breast contact. That is, nobody has reported seeing patients with HIV in whom such events were the only possible exposures. That doesn't prove the risk is zero:  if one acquires HIV after unprotected vaginal or anal sex and the event also included kissing and fingering, how can you know which of these was the source? On the other hand, if they were risky, surely there would have been someone somewhere whose exposure included ONLY such events and there have been none reported. So we can be confident the risk is exceedingly low and likely truly zero.

I'll also point out that HIV is very rare in women in the UK, even those who are very sexually active; and even with unprotected vaginal or anal sex, heterosexual exposures account for very few HIV infections. You probably could find data online, e.g. from Public Health England.

So from a medical/risk perspective, I would not advise HIV testing (or testing for any other STIs). That said, reassurance alone is a valid reason for testing:  if you find yourself worrying about it, feel free to be tested in a few weeks. But if somehow I were in your situation -- or if I were advising my own son or daughter -- I would not seek or advise that they be tested in this situation.

I hope this reply is helpful. Let me know if anything isn't clear.

HHH, MD