About two weeks ago, I had insertive oral sex with ejaculation in the mouth of a female with unknown status. She claims that while she is still in a relationship on paper, bit she has not been intimate for more than 8 years due to issues with intimacy. now she started a relationship after leaving the old one and this has got me worried. I am thinking what if she actually has been active, 

now my exposure has been, 1st time two weeks ago, i was insertive partner and with ejaculation in her mouth. she also masturbated for me with saliva and i kissed her deeply with tongues involved and also she licked and performed sucking on my fingers.

at the time she had visible acne/lesions on face and thigh and hand which a dermatologist had told her it is because of stress. 

second exposure was a week later with same things done.

third exposure was 3 days after last one and i rubbed her genital area from top of her pants but my hands got wet.

she claims she has not been with anyone and she wants to stay with me as she loves me. my mind is worried about diseases, HIV, HPV, Herpes, Gonorrhea etc. I even informed her about my concerns and she got a bit offended. do i need testing? i have some mild burning while urinating and had a few itchy spots on lower back which resolved and also last night my scrotum and my shaft felt dry and a bit red and itchy which i applied some vaseline and the itchiness is resolved. burning is still there a bit.

Thank you 

Given your concerns, you both need to test.  On occasion in the early stages of a relationship which may become ongoing, it is helpful to suggest that as a reassurance to each other and to get started on the right foot, it would be helpful for you both to go together and get screened (tested) for STIs so that you can move forward without concern.  Offering to test with her would likely be reassuring to you both and all you to move forward.   If she refuses to test, then the right thing to do is to tell her of your symptoms and go get tested yourself.  Without that I suspect you will continue to worry.   EWH

What would be your suggestion if if i were to not continue this relationship. would you still suggest testing based on the activities listed? just want to get the idea if the relationship and trust factors were completely out of the picture and the focus being on purely on the facts. (with respect to diseases and risks)

what are my chances of acquiring HIV, HPV or Herpes based on the activities that i mentioned?

Insertive oral with ejaculation (duration was long) on two occasions

deep kissing

my finger being sucked by her

me touching her genitals.

Thank you

Best,

If not for your anxiety I would say that while testing is always a personal choice, in your situation and in the absence of obvious symptoms, I would not both to test.  

Your risk of HIV is virtually zero.  There are no proven cases of HIV acquired from receipt of oral sex or the other activities you describe.  Similarly your risk of herpes is very low and if no obvious HSV sores are present within 10 days of your exposure, you are not going to get them.  Finally, assuming you have been sexually active in the past and are unvaccinated, you probably have HPV already and the activities you describe do not meaningfully increase your risk.  Over 80% of sexually active adults have or have had HPV whether or not they know it.  This topic is extensively discussed in other posted other the Forum with HPV in their title- we make those threads available so that they can be reviewed for informational purposes.  I encourage you to do so.  

This completes this thread.  Take care.  Please don't worry.  EWH