[Question #1430] Lap Dance

78 months ago
Hi Doctors,
I would keep it simple and to the point.

About Me:
1. In a commited relationship.
2. Last tested for HiV two weeks ago and negative.
3. Never had intercourse outside the relationship, and always protected.
4. Hypocondriac and HiV OCD.

1. I went to a strip club in NYC, and had 5-6 lap dances with different ladies.

2. I was fully clothed with my jeans and boxer shorts. The strippers were wearing g-strings.

3. I did not indulge in fingering; and my pants were always on.

4. The strippers did grind back and forth as part of the lap dance.

5. Couple of hours into the action,  I did not see any wet spots on my jeans or boxer, unless they dried out. Even then I did not see any dried stains.


1. Was it a ZERO risk exposure for HiV? Am I in clear?

2. What if the stripper(s) was having a heavy vaginal discharge that may have found way to the urethra? Should I be worried of HiV and passing it on to my regular partner?

3. I guess by the time the vaginal fluid would reach uethea across the jeans and boxer shorts, the virus would already be dead. Correct?

4.  If I ever go again to strip clubs and if I ONLY indulge in lap dance with my clothes on, no kissing, no fingering, should I be worried of HiV? If yes, should I wear a condom underneath my jeans and boxers?

5. If I decide to go for testing, would a 28 day RAPID 4th Gen combo test be enough? Or should I go to a lab? The RAPID test is good for my anxiety as I get the result in 20 mins.


H. Hunter Handsfield, MD
78 months ago
I'll try to help, but as you probably know, OCD by definition is irrational, and is not helped much be repeating the facts about risk -- as illustrated by this as your fifth question in 3 months about similar risk free events. Please get this straight: if your penis does not enter another person's vagina, rectum (or maybe mouth) -- or another's penis in your mouth or rectum -- and if you never share drug injection equipment with another person, you will never get HIV. There is no point in asking about any other kinds of exposure. Nobody in the world ever caught HIV from events like you describe here. To your specific questions:

1) Yes zero risk and you are in the clear.

2) From the events described, how could vaginal secretions "found way to the urethra"? It does not good to participate in nonsense speculation about events that didn't happen! Butif somehow they did, it could not have been in sufficient quantity for you to be infected. And without obvious moisture....  well obviously this should not be a concern.

3 The virus would not be dead that quickly. But cloth fibers are efficient filters and would have reduced the virus to sufficiently low amounts that transmission isn't possible.

4) It doesn't matter what you wear for future events like this one. 

5) Since there was no risk, there is no need for testing, hence it doesn't matter what test you do. Any 4th gen test, rapid or lab based, is conclusive at 28 days.

In the second of your several questions, my closing reply included "please note that the forum does not accept repetative anxiety driven questions, both to save users from themselves in terms of repeated spending for advice that will not change, and because such questions have no educational value for other users. Such repeat questions are deleted without reply and without refund of the posting fee." Dr. Hook apparently didn't get the word, and so answered your next ones and I have answered this one. But it's the last one; the policy will definitely be invoked hereafter. Do your best to move on without worry -- and if not in counseling or other treatment for that OCD, I strongly recommend you do that (a reccomendation from compassion, not criticism).

Best wishes and stay safe--  HHH, MD

78 months ago
Hi Doc HHH,
Thanks for your advice and I am looking to find a specialist for my OCD, but it is kind of difficult to find one.

You asked how could the fluid found a way to urethra? I had 6 lap dances, so I thought that while she was grinding, the active fluid could have passed through my clothes and made contact with urethra. And thats what freaking me out.  I only checked my jeans couple of ours after the lap dances were over and the moisture might have dried by that time, so I may have missed seeing the wetness on my jeans.

78 months ago
Last night I went to a strip club in Vegas, had few private lap dances. I thought it would be a good idea to wear a condom just in case some vaginal fluid seeps in. 

But I made one mistake and that is everytime ( 6-7 times) I went to pee I removed the same condom, and after peeing I wore the same condom  again.

Everytime I removed the condom, the inside of it popped out and I had to use my fingers to push it in, and thats worrying me now. 

Did I give the HiV virus a conducive closed environment if my hands were dirty?

 I went to the bathroom right after the lap dance was over and I could have some virus on my hands. I did not touch stripper's private part for sure, but touched her body, the couch and my belt buckle which may have the virus.

Do I need to worry about HiV for this exposure? I am freaking out, please advise.


78 months ago
Hi Dr Cook,
It seems Dr HHH is not around, could you please look into my latest exposure? I am panicking a lot and cursing myself about how could I use the condom so wrong.

H. Hunter Handsfield, MD
78 months ago
Still no risk at all. Your OCD is leading to serious over-analysis of nonsensical scenarios. Trust me on this:  NOBODY ever caught any STD by the sorts of events you describe.

Finding a psychological counselor is a trivial exercise in asking your primary doctor or looking online.

That will have to conclude this thread. Please note the policy noted above. This is not an OCD management service, and any future questions definitely will be deleted without reply and without refund. Good bye and good luck.