Respected Doctors,
This time the question is about me. Last week, my friend has a bachelor's party and we all went to a strip club where I ended up having few private dances. The strippers were nude, but I never took my clothes off. There was no kissing, no touching the private parts, but the stripper was touching her private part and then rubbing those fingers all over her body; and then I did touch her body at few places (but not her private part). Anticipating what may happen (but nothing actually happened), I was wearing a condom which I removed and wore again during the bathroom breaks (EIGHT of them in total). I presume my hands were not clean as I touched the bodies of strippers, the bathroom doors, and also my clothes might have some of her fluids (even though I did not see any visible moisture). And to make matters worst, I may have touched the inside of the condom with the same hands, and then wore the condom again. This happened EIGHT times in total.I would appreciate if you could answer the questions in the order :

I believe if I would not have been worried if I would have just touched my penis while using the washroom, but I am freaking out thinking that the condom use might have changed the equation as I may have provided the HiV virus much better environment to thrive [by enclosing it]. Is my thinking totally irrational?

Am I in clear and resume relationship with my regular partner? I have never had unprotected sex outside the relationship, and never did drugs.

Am I wrong in assuming that the stripper(s) might have HiV? I spoke with one of them, and she told me that she has a daughter who goes to high school, and that made me believe that the perception about the strippers is so wrong. They do have a family life, and that should make them extra careful when dealing with potential HiV exposures.

Is HiV still a deadly sentence? Whatever I have read about it makes me believe that now a days its just like another disease i.e. diabetes etc. So why do people still worried about it? I fear HiV more than cancer!!

Welcome to the Forum.  I will try to help.  The summary answer to your question is that the events you describe did not put you at any risk for acquisition of ANY STI, including HIV.  HIV is transmitted in adults ONLY through penetrative sexual contact or injection of infected material deep into tissue.  There are NO cases of HIV which have been demonstrated to be transmitted by the transfer of genital secretions from one person to another on someone's hands or body parts if penetration did not take place.  This is the case even if those secretions were on the inside of a condom worn in the way you describe.

With regard to your wearing a condom "just in case", I should point out that I know of no experts who recommend using condoms in the fashion you describe and that it is not recommended that condoms be taken off and then put on again.  What you describe did not put you at risk but it also offered you no certain protection when used in the way you used.

Regarding strippers and commercial sex workers.  not all exotic dancers are commercial sex workers CSWs) although some are.  As a group, most CSWs do not have STIs, including HIV and they tend to take better protection and be lower risk sex partners than the sort of "casual" partner that one might pick up in a bar who does not take good care of themselves, take precautions or get regular check ups as most CSWs do.

Finally, HIV is no longer and "automatic death sentence".  When persons acquire HIV the infection is typically treatable and most persons who take their medications will live a normal lifespan.  Other than the fact that it can be transmitted from person to person, your analogy of being like other chromic illnesses such as hypertension or diabetes which can cause much illness if people don't take their medications, if persons with HIV take their medications they can live a normal lifespan.  EWH

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Thanks Dr Cook.  Few quick questions:

Perhaps you missed what I said above - " HIV is transmitted in adults ONLY through penetrative sexual contact or injection of infected material deep into tissue.  There are NO cases of HIV which have been demonstrated to be transmitted by the transfer of genital secretions from one person to another on someone's hands or body parts if penetration did not take place. "   the events you describe place you at no risk for HIV or for any other STI.

Thus for your questions:

1. since a lap dance is a no risk event, I see no reason for wearing a condom.  It serves no purpose.

2.  Having masturbated before going to the club makes no difference. - it was still a no risk event

3.  The circumstance you describe is no risk. 

4.  No need for testing related to the events you describe.  .

EWH

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Thanks Doc. One last question-if down the line I am in a different relationship[and not knowing her past sexual life], or may be with a CSW,  who knows, do I need to wash my hands before I relace the old condom with a new one? This could happen in middle of an intercourse where my hands  could be dirty because I touched the outside of the old condom while removing it, and the condom might have her secretions. 

Before I answer, might I ask if you have posed in the past using the pseudonym "concerned-user"  EWH
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Respected Doctor,

As I said earlier in my initial reply -"There are NO cases of HIV which have been demonstrated to be transmitted by the transfer of genital secretions from one person to another on someone's hands or body parts if penetration did not take place"..  Thus, no matter who your partner is and whether or not they have an infection of any sort, there is no need to wash your hands when taking off one condom and putting on another.  No STIs including HIV can be transmitted in this way.

As you know, our Forum provides up to three answers per client, thus this will be the final response as part of this thread and the thread will be closed later today.  EWH

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So, no need to wash hands even if there is a potential of hands having the secerition from old condom, and those same hands could touch the penis which would then be protected with a new condom? The 'enclosing' does not pose any risk. Correct?