Honestly, you have rather seriously overreactted. I would not have recommended the tests you had, nor would I have abstained from sex with my wife all this time if somehow I had been in your circumstance. First, female escorts (expensive sex workers by appointment) tend to have fairly low STD rates. They know the score, get tested frequently, and mostly their clients are themselves low risk -- i.e. men like you. (You don't say whether a condom was in place for this event; if so, the risk was nil. But I'll go on the assumption the exposure was unprotected.) Second, the chance of STD transmission from any single vaginal sex exposure typically is low, even when one partner is infected -- and it's especially low for a brief exposure of the sort you had. Third, for sure herpes testing wasn't necessary after such an event, in the absence of symptoms to suggest you were infected. If testing were done at all in this situation, a urine test for gonorrhea and chlamydia (any time over 3-5 days after the event) and blood tests for HIV and syphilis (at 4-6 weeks) is all I would have recommended. Finally and probably most important, the various STD tests are highly accurate and your negative results are conclusive. Regardless of all the foregoing about low risk, even if the risk had been high, the test results rule. They show with certainty that you did not acquire any of the STDs for which you were tested.

So my advice is to go forward with complete confidence about it and resume normal relations with your wife. All is well!

I hope this has helped. Best wishes--  HHH, MD