Dear Doctors:

 

Thank you first of all for the great information and services you provide through this website. I have gained a lot of knowledge reading your online answers to the various sexual health topics.

 

I’d like to have your feedback on two recent sexual encounters I had with a CSW. Actually, I met this Asian girl at a massage parlor in NY, and while the first two times we only engaged in mutual masturbation and condom-protected oral sex, some three weeks ago there was also a very brief protected vaginal intercourse and the same happened (in a longer form) 10 days ago.

 

I asked her whether she has got tested for STDs and she told me not to worry. I don’t trust what she said blindly, but from my position I think to have been super careful in the vaginal sex I engaged in with her. Basically, I avoided any vigorous rubbing of the non-condom protected penis against her vagina, and in this respect I don’t even think there was so much contact at all. Also, I didn’t see any signs of herpetic rush in her vagina.

 

The condom remained intact and I checked this very carefully after the ejaculation. With my high level of attention, would you say that there are still potential risks to contract STDs in this sexual activity (i.e. condom-protected sex with minimal or no friction of the scrotum and uncovered penis against the vaginal site)?

 

I wouldn’t want to play any Russian roulette in this and feel that if such an encounter should happen again with this or another girl I can be confident to have had totally safe sex.

 

Obviously, the girl in question sees numerous clients every day, and I’m sure this exposes her to different risks. One thing I can say, however, is that she seems to engage in protected sexual activities. The 2nd time I saw her she wanted to give me an unprotected blowjob but I asked her to use a condom.

 

Anyway, my main question is: as long as the condom remains intact, is the sexual activity I describe safe in all respects?

 

Thank you so much!

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Thank you for your detailed assessment, Dr. Hook. I’m glad to have learned something about “safe sex,” thanks to this excellent website as well.

Your reply suggests that I ask more specific questions this time.

1) Doesn’t the transmission of gonorrhea and Chlamydia require infected fluids to enter the penile urethra? I thought that these are not STDs that are transmissible skin to skin. So, if the condom remains intact, can one rule out completely the possibility of catching either one?

2) More specifically about skin-to-skin transmission of STDs, like I mentioned in my message, I was very careful in preventing frictions of the non-condom protected penis against her vagina. I should add that this excessive level of attention did make the sexual experience less enjoyable in a way. My question here is: as long as the woman presents no visible signs of rushes or outbreaks, is it even so necessary to be worried of the slightest skin contact with the vaginal site? I recently read that the penile skin and scrotum are not mucous membranes.  

3) Is it safe to continue seeing this same woman if I adhere to the kind of safe sex I had before with her? What would be the worst case scenario for me using a condom that remains intact?

4) I have read before on this forum the risk distinction in having sex with escorts who receive by appointment versus brothels and street prostitutes. This obviously implies that the last two categories present more potential risks. Is it because high-end escorts take more precautions, or because it’s more likely they see (rich) clients with fewer risks of STDs?

Thank you once again! 

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Thanks again Dr. Hook. Your answer is reassuring, as the way most websites talk about condom protection looks as though they work only to a certain degree (high as it may be, but not 100%). In this respect, the reassurance I needed is that bacteria and viruses don't pass through intact latex.  

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