[Question #2435] Hpv/GW/specific to my situation

45 months ago

Hello doctors, I've read many of the questions and answers on here but I need answers specific to my own situation. I'm starting to get freaked out all over again. 
I am a 48 y/o male soon to be 49. In Aug 2012 I went outside my marriage and had protected and unprotected sex 3x with a married woman, thinking it was safe because she was married. Then in June & Sept 2013 I again had unprotected sex with a different married woman. The first woman there was oral & genital to genital sex performed on both of us by both of us. The second woman there was genital to genital sex and she performed oral sex on me. Then there was kissing after the oral. Early Sept (3 months after my first encounter with the second woman) I remember feeling a tiny bump on the roof of my mouth. By the end of Sept 2013 I was sick with what my PC dr said was viral pharyngitis. During this same time I had a wart on my penis where my circumcision scar is. Needless to say I was overcome with anxiety & panic for months. Sometime prior to the viral pharyngitis I remember seeing what I later know to be a wart on the side of my penis (dif location than mentioned above) but it had disappeared and I forgot about it. Not sure if I saw it after the first woman or after my first encounter with the second woman. Both deny having hpv. Anyway my Dermatoligist removed the wart by cutting it off and by Oct 2013 confirmed to me it was a wart. The viral pharyngitis healed but left me with a tiny flat scar type patch on the roof of my mouth. During that time I had my PC dr, ENT dr, dentist and oral surgeon look at it on the roof of my mouth and they all say it's nothing. I've always thought it was a wart and still fear it might be. The first woman said she has nothing and has always had normal Pap test. She admits to being with more men than just me outside her marriage. The second woman said I'm the only one she's been with outside of her marriage and says she has never had warts or hpv but has had irregular or not normal Pap test. I think she said she had/has cysts. Maybe something else but not an std. Since having the one wart removed I've had no recurrences. All most 4 years now. And no sex during this whole time. 
A few days ago I had unprotected sex with a woman. I know bad move but it was spur of the moment and I wasn't prepared. Now I'm freaking out I may have infected her. I did not tell her of my hpv. I do not want to tell her because I don't wanna be labeled as gross or dirty. I don't wanna put it out there and take a chance of her telling people and then my secret is out to the public or friends etc.. I have no idea which hpv type I have. I've read your answers to other questions. So I guess my questions are 1. What type of hpv do you think I have and 2. Am I infecting her? Do I need to worry? What do I do if all of a sudden next week she comes to me and says she has warts and its from me? I know it's almost impossible to try and find out who I got it from but I suspect it was one of the two woman I was with in 2012 & 2013. I don't know what to do. It's kinda too late now anyway. The stress of it all is causing me not to perform well in the bedroom. Get it up as we say because during this time I have all this on my mind. I am feeling very guilty. Is it gone? Dormant? How do I know if I'm still shedding? Etc.. I don't even know what to ask anymore. I just wanna be normal and move on with no worries about having sex and potentially infecting someone else. I mean the woman I got it from had no symptoms. No warts. Could I have gotten this many many years ago and all of a sudden just appear? If so how coincidental that it showed itself after I had sex outside my marriage after all these years. And from what I know my wife has nothing. No sex with my wife in many years. Hence the cause of me going outside the marriage. So confused. Thanks for reading this long crazy post. 

Edward W. Hook M.D.
Edward W. Hook M.D.
45 months ago
Welcome to our Forum.  Before I address your specific questions, let me point out that there is no evidence that you have HPV at this time.  The wart that you had several years ago was removed and has not recurred and the lesion on your palate that concerns you has been evaluated by several trained clinicians who do not feel that the lesion you describe is a wart.  Further, while most sexually active persons will acquire HPV at some point, the prevalence of infection actually goes down as folks age because the infection is cleared.  I see reason for concern and as you know from reading our responses to others, we see no compelling reason for you to disclose your past infection.  Thus, in answer to your questions:

1.  See above.  I see reason for concern that you are currently infected.  Your prior wart was most likely HPV 6 or 11 as these types cause most visible warts.
2.  As explained above, I see no reason for worry and no reason for disclose....In fact it seems to me that there is nothing to disclose.

While I applaud your concern for your sexual partner(s), I think you need to stop worrying and move forward.  I hope my comments are helpful.  EWH
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45 months ago
Thank you for your response. I do feel better now after reading your reply. I kinda felt that's how you would answer after reading much of the other questions and answers. I just needed it to be said to me directly in response to my own situation. Thank you.  I think it's my guilt and anxiety getting the best of me.  I'll seek help for that if necessary. One follow up question. Do you think my diagnosis of viral pharyngitis was actually oral hpv showing itself? Are symptoms the same? Just curious. Thanks again. 
Edward W. Hook M.D.
Edward W. Hook M.D.
45 months ago
I'm pleased my response was helpful.  With respect to your question about your episode of pharyngitis being a manifestation of oral HPV, the answer is no since oral HPV infections are typically asymptomatic.  Rather I suspect it was the sort of run of the mill, viral pharyngitis that most people get from time to time.  EWH
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45 months ago
Dr Hook thank you so much. I feel so much better. Thank you for your service and allowing me and many other people to access you on this site and ask questions. It's a huge relief. Keep up the good work and thanks for doing what you do. God bless you. 
Edward W. Hook M.D.
Edward W. Hook M.D.
45 months ago
Glad,I could,help .   Assuming that your concerns have now been addressed, this thread will be closed later today.   Take care.  EWH---