I have HSV2, contracted via date rape in college.  I have not had an outbreak in over a year, I started taking antiviral last month.  I recently started dating someone, he performed oral sex on me prior to our having a sexual health discussion.  I am inexperienced at dating and disclosure due to my history.  I didn't know he was going to try, I tried to stop him 5 times, but was weak and gave in.  I did not have any active sores but my back hurt earlier in the week.  I don't know if I have internal ob's.  2 days later I woke up with tingling, outside of labia near buttock, have not had sores.  He has had an intermittent sore throat since last Tuesday, 6 days post exposure, no sores/fever/fatigue, but a swollen lymph node under his jaw getting worse.   We work together, we already agreed things moved to fast and are not dating now but trying to remain friends.   I don't know what his risk level is, transmission probability, or how to tell him.  I would like to go prepared with information but cannot find much on this type of transmission.  I do not know if he is immune compromised, he does have anxiety, and takes some medications, and he smokes.  I already know that my actions are not indicative of the level of fondness I have for him and feel horribly guilty.

I think the chances of him acquiring HSV 2 orally through this one incident are incredibly low.  If transmission did occur, it would look just like a cold sore.  but HSV 2 doesn't like the mouth much at all and rarely lives or recurs there.  Since you work together, I think you would have noticed if he had a sore on his lip, right?  And he could have his own history of cold sores as well.  Your symptoms don't sound herpetic to me at all, either.  I doubt it was an outbreak or even prodrome.

Terri


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