[Question #3197] Really Scared

39 months ago
I never had any sex outside my marriage. Two days back after office hours went to a strip club. The intent was to relax and not have any sex. I wasn’t drunk and ordered coke to drink. While drinking I realized that my lips were dry/chapped and I peeled out a very very small piece of skin from my lip. I was constantly wetting my lips with saliva. A  Brazilian stripper approached me and offered for lap dance. She took me to vip room and started with lap dance. During all three lap dance I never had any kind of sex( oral vaginal and anal). I was fully clothed with formal pants and underwear. The stripper kept on touching my genital with her fingers and squeezed my penis while I was fully clothed.  I touched/rubbed her thighs butt cheeks and breasts with my hands. Never touched / fingered her vagina, anus . Never touched her nipples when she showed it.  During the dance the stripper kissed my neck and licked my ear lobes couple of times. She also tried to kiss my lips and I resisted. So I did not open my mouth and kiss her lips and  did not do any french kissing.  After the dance was over I went to restroom and washed my earlobes with little water and left. I was not comfortable with what happened and I am scared as the activities might have exposed me to getting hiv or any stds transmitted to me. Please clarify the following:1) I used my hands to touch the breasts butt cheeks and thighs and I had callus on my palms. I got them because I regularly go to gym and lift weights with my bare hands . My  left palm had callus at two or three places with very rough and little bumped up skin. No cuts or openings and not active bleeding or blood dried up. So callus on palms can cause any risk while rubbing. 2) can stripper transmit anything when she tried to lick my earlobes por kiss my lips. Can I get hiv or any stds I didn’t talk to my wife and touch my kids as I am scared can I have regular sex with my wife or shud I get tested please advise

H. Hunter Handsfield, MD
H. Hunter Handsfield, MD
39 months ago
Welcome to the forum. Thanks for your question.

There was absolutely no risk from these events and no possibility you acquired HIV (or any other STD), whether or not the stripper was infected. Hand-genital contact is risk free, even when genital fluids are used for lubrication. And superficial licking also isn't a risk. The various skin conditions you describe make no difference. Without intercourse, there is no risk, period. You do not need testing for anything and you can have sex with your wife as normal without putting her at risk; and you can have normal, day to day loving interactions with your kids' STDs and HIV are never transmitted by such contact. 

I hope these comments are helpful. Let me know if anything isn't clear.

HHH, MD

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39 months ago
Thank you so much doctor. U really bailed me out
39 months ago
Sorry Doctor. Just one quick clarification. For the second question when the stripper tried kissing my chapped lips with skin peeled out. Is that also a no risky situation.  Did u review that also in ur response
H. Hunter Handsfield, MD
H. Hunter Handsfield, MD
39 months ago
Yes, I saw and understood that information. It does not change anything:  still no risk, no worries.

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