[Question #3682] Worried about Std

35 months ago
Hello,  I believe i have an std and want to identify which one it is.  With my last 4 sexual partners, each has gotten sick after we had sex.  Mentioning to me that they all had very severe neck or head pain  after our interactions.   One had some kind of bumps on her vagina but doctors told her it was some kind of blood infection.  I used a condom with 3 and only with the latest was oral part of it and a day and a half later she had very bad pain in the side of her face and neck.  The sex was not rough.   I have had as many as five full std tests including igg but i keep coming back negative for everything.  I have noticed some signs of herpes on my penis but anytime I've gone to the doctor they have said they don't worry them, and they aren't  painful.  I'm very concerned I have a rare form of something or am not responding to testing as I find it very unlikely this is a coincidence.  Any idea what i have and how i should proceed?
H. Hunter Handsfield, MD
H. Hunter Handsfield, MD
35 months ago
Welcome back to your forum.

This question is quite similar to the one you posted a year ago. As discussed last time, these symptoms don't fit with any known STD. As for "coincidence", my first question is whether you have alerted your more recent partners to symptoms other have had, before they noticed anything wrong. These sorts of symptoms are the kinds that are highly susceptible to suggestion and emotion. Were they examined by medical professionals? What did they think?

As for "signs of herpes on my penis", perhaps I would have something to say if you'd like to describe them. I can't think of any "signs of herpes" that would look normal to an examining doctor.

Sorry I can't be more helpful, but I'll be happy to consider these issues further if you'd like to fill in some of the details.

HHH, MD
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35 months ago
Hey Doctor Handsfield,  thanks for your help.  Yes, unfortunately my posts are similar.  I took your advice last time and moved on but had another experience with a new partner experiencing the symptoms (not suggested by me to them in any way).  I'm aware I sound delusional by not listening to the tests but feel I need to search to be aware of anything I can do.   

To me, all four of the last partners I have had experiencing the same symptoms, would be incredibly unlikely if I wasn't the cause.   

Only one of the women told me she went to the doctors and had some kind of vagina issues.  She was told she had some kind of blood infection.   The others only mentioned the neck pain and its severity along with some nausea.  

What do you know about initial herpes contraction and neck pain or any other STDs?  Do you have links to any resources?  Do you suggest any other options to helping me get to the bottom of this or how I should proceed with future sexual partners (assuming you believe what I'm saying and are alarmed by the correlation)?  Can viral cultures pick up on some cases where a blood test fails?  


H. Hunter Handsfield, MD
H. Hunter Handsfield, MD
34 months ago
With great apology, somehow I missed this comment.

There are no STDs that would cause neck pain, and certainly herpes does not. As for all 4 partners having "the same symptoms", as best I can tell these are very nonspecific sensations, i.e. not pointing to any particular health problem, and highly subjective, i.e. highly variable in how each person might perceive them. (Who hasn't had neck pain from time to time?) In these circumstances, I have to suspect that you're the one first mentioning these things, with your partners then agreeing that they have noticed them. My advice for future partnerships is that you say absolutely nothing to partners about STDs and your fears, or about symptoms they might have, or symptoms other partners mentioned to you.

The HSV blood tests are highly reliable. There is no need for virus testing in this situation.

Sorry again for the extreme delay. Normally this thread would be closed, but I'll leave it open a while longer in case you have further concerns.

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