[Question #4451] Panicked. Did I infect S.O.

29 months ago
Nuts and bolts of this horrible thing I did.
10-15 Unprotected vaginal and oral sex with very high end CSW.  Have seen her once before.  She did not mention or attempt to use a condom and I went with it in heat of moment.
10-20 Unprotected vaginal sex with wife.
10-25 Wife mentions she thinks she has a yeast infection.  A true oh god moment for me.  Constant mild itching and slight burning when she pees.  A little discharge.  I called the CSW on this date.  She was very very nice and overly adamant that she is cleaned.  Her hygiene was sure impeccable to me.  Says she gets tested regularly and has open relationship with her doc about her profession.  Says she has no symptoms of anything and that she would tell me if she did.
10-28/29  Wife says its much better than before.  Just a constant mild itch.  Maybe a little burn when peeing but not much.
10-30 This morning she says getting her period.  Itching and burning is worse again with horrible cramps.

Ok, I am panicked here.  What have I done?  I have had no symptoms whatsoever except for mildly enlarged prostate and some discomfort in penis.  No burning, no discharge, no skin problems on penis at all.

Went to my doctor yesterday and told him the whole story.  EVERYTHING I could think of.  (M.D. for 52 years)  He checked my penis and gave me a finger prostate exam.  Said my prostate felt "a little swollen" and that genital focused anxiety can cause that.  Gave me a cardboard dipstick looking thing to pee on.  Wrote a lab order for 10 panel test and I went immediately.  Now I have to wait at least until friday and the anxiety is affecting me horribly.  Shaking as I type.

My doctor told me point blank and emphatically that he thinks it will be neg.  He said bad timing on a yeast infection or other problem with wife.  Reason he gave, no symptoms in CSW, no symptoms in me, no leukocytes/nitrites showed on dipstick.  (Gave me an extra one to take home and pee on first thing this morning, no reaction).

Is my doctor correct?  Am I 

Edward W. Hook M.D.
Edward W. Hook M.D.
29 months ago
Welcome to our Forum.  I'll be glad to comment.  Bottom line, I agree with your doctor - the exposure you describe was low risk and not something to worry about.  Let me expand on this:
1.  High end commercial sex workers have very low rates of STIs and as your partner told you, as professionals they tend to be very careful about regular check ups making her likelihood of being infected low.
2.  Clients of high end CSWs have few STIs making it less likely that she would have been infected
3.  Even when partners have STIs, most exposures to infected partners do not result in infection.
4.  You do not have symptoms
5.  you have been examined by a trained health care provider who saw no signs of infection.
6.  You had a urinalysis dip stick which showed no inflammation (white blood cells).

Putting all of this together, I agree with your doctor's assessment.  I also agree that is was worthwhile for you to be tested and I anticipate that your testing included a urine test for gonorrhea and chlamydia, the most common STIs.  I anticipate that the tests will be negative which I hope will relieve your concerns.  

My guess is that your wife's symptoms are unrelated and coincidence.  

I hope that this information is helpful to you.  Please do not worry and please stay off the internet.  It will only mislead you and raise your anxiety.  EWH

29 months ago
Thank you Dr. Hook.  I so appreciate what you folks are doing here.  You don't charge enough!  

Yes, I provided urine and blood to the lab.   I guess this could be considered the worst timing of the century.  After 8 years of marriage she has had NO yeast infections or other vaginal problems that I know of.   BTW, this website came highly recommend from my docs office lady (who is his wife).   For the hopeful benefit of other readers,  I will post my test results if you folks leave this thread open.

I was on the phone with wife just before your answer.  Because of that call from her, I would like to ask a couple additional things if I may.

She has set appt with her doctor.  She has not started "flowing" yet but swears that she is experiencing horrible "worst ever period cramps" and that the itching/burning is worse since this morning.  5-6 days of itching/burning and she wants to get it checked.  

What could be wrong with her if its not STD?  She states she has never felt this way that she remembers.

Is it possible for CSW to have infection with no symptoms,  me to have an infection, have no symptoms, negative urine stick, and me still be infected?  Still pass it on being asymptomatic after 15 days?

Because of your response, my anxiety is lower, but still there over wife reporting "never been this bad before."  The timing of it is just horrible.  

I forgot to mention my age is 48.  Hers is 49.  If that matters to you sir.
Edward W. Hook M.D.
Edward W. Hook M.D.
29 months ago
The cramping and discomfort are troublesome and I'm pleased that your wife is going for an evaluation.  i would be remiss if I did not mention that, on occasion, sex can lead to either urinary tract infections or the introduction of a woman's normal vaginal bacteria into the upper genital tract to cause the sorts of discomfort that you describe.  While neither of these is an STI in the traditional sense of an infection transferring bacteria from one person to another, the sex act itself can predispose to these sorts of symptoms, unrelated to partner numbers.  

In answer to your question:
Yes, it is possible for a CSW to have an infection and be unaware of it.  In fact, most STIs in women are asymptomatic.  OTOH, in men most STIs do cause symptoms and do signs of inflammation and that you have neither is part of the reason that I (and your own doctor doubt that this is an STI)

Bottom line- you wife needs to be evaluated. The great likelihood is that this is not an STI and she needs to find out what is going on.  While she does, you need to control your guilt and resulting anxiety.  What is done is done, get the tests, move forward.  

Finally, I do need to point out that our Forum provides up to three responses to each client's questions. this is my 3rd response.  Thus there will not be further answers coming from me.  I will however leave this thread open so that you can comment on what your wife's doctor says- I would very much appreciate hearing his/her comments and may have some further feedback once I hear.  Hope this all helps. EWH  
29 months ago
I count only two responses but we all work for a living and I am not going to contest that point.  You folks don't charge enough for your services as is.  So, thank you again.  And in case you missed it in my earlier comment, your site was recommended to me by my doctors office.  That says a heck of a lot about you folks.

I suppose the lab lady yesterday morning was wrong about waiting until at least Friday, because I received a call from the doctor this evening and the results are back.

 Here is how it reads.....  GNA- Neg.  CHLA- Neg.  HSV 1 >5.00.  HSV 2 Neg.  Hep A- Non reactive.  Hep B Non reactive.  Hep C- Non reactive.  HIV 1/2 Non reactive.  RPR- Non reactive. 

Wife has her appointment in two days with GYN.  

Thank you Dr. Hook for your time and effort here.
Edward W. Hook M.D.
Edward W. Hook M.D.
29 months ago
Sorry, I miscounted.  I appreciate your pointing it out.  Also glad to hear of your results.  Several comments:
1.  The tests for gonorrhea (GNA) and chlamydia are conclusive. these tests are extraordinarily accurate and at the time you were tested, provide accurate results...This is important as these are the two organisms which would be most likely to cause your wife's symptoms if she did have an STI.  You are in the clear.
2.  Your HSV-1test indicates that sometime in the past you had herpes simplex type-1, the virus that causes cold sores.  I suspect you have had it for years.  
3.  The antibody tests for other possible STIs- HSV-2, hepatitis A, B, and C, the HIV test, and the RPR (Syphilis test) are all too early to be conclusive but your risk for any of these is miniscule (virtually zero).

I would say you can relax about having gotten an STI.  I still think your wife needs to be seen and if she does not get better (she sounded pretty ill to me), I would have her call tomorrow and ask if she can be seen- in my opinion, two days is too long to wait if her symptoms are sever.

I will still keep the thread open, I would really like to hear what your wife's doctor says.  In the meantime, I hope that you are feeling a bit better- STIs are out of the picture.  EWH