[Question #4672] Gay sex

26 months ago
Dear Dr,

My exposures to date have been getting rimmed , fingered, recieving oral sex ( No condom) , kissing and ( giving oral sex) - always with a condom.
Two times this year after i had oral sex i had a fever n sore throat which cleared off itself.
Since a few months i now have a rash in my inner buttock and groin area. I visited my gp and he said its a fungal infection.
I am worried about contracting hiv from guving oral sex. Though inused a condom , what if it tore and i didnt notice it. I have recd oral sex twice this year and guven oral sex thrice ( WITH  a condom) . It was deepthroat oral once though. 
I also have a dry mouth quiye often and this fingal infection in my groinf and buttock area. Would this fungal infection not be going because i have got a weak immine system bcoz of hiv? 
What are the chances that i have hiv from the oral sex exposures. I understand that fingering, rimming and kissing are quite safe.
Request you to please advise.
Also at what stage of hiv do people develop fungal infections generally ? Would it happen in a few months from exposure?

Thanking you in anticipation 
H. Hunter Handsfield, MD
H. Hunter Handsfield, MD
26 months ago
Welcome back, but sorry you found it necessary after the reasoned, science based reassurance you had from Dr. Hook, about exactly thse same questions. I'll quickly answer them, but this will have to be your last question on the forum along these lines.

There has never been a proved case of HIV transmission mouth to penis. That doesn't prove it can't happen, but if it does, it is exceedingly rare. One estimate (from the US Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, CDC) is that if the oral partner has HIV, the risk from a single episode of oral sex is 1 in 20,000. That's equivalent to receiving BJs by infected partners once daily for 55 years before transmission might be likely. Zero risk for all practial purposes. And with a condom, of course the risk is zero anyway:  HIV cannot pass through intact lasix. And as you have been told previously, you are correct that fingering, rimming, and kissing carry no significant risk of HIV.

Dry mouth and other symptoms like yours are extremely common from innumerable medical conditions. In itself, it does not even hint at HIV. And significant fungal infections occur primarily with advance HIV disease (overt AIDS), not within weeks or months of new exposures.

Sexual safety for HIV is pretty simple and straightforward:  NO RISK if you do not have unprotected anal or vaginal sex. Period. No need to ask about any other kinds of exposure -- the answers will always be the same as you have already had in this and/or your several previous threads. As long as you continue your current sexual lifestyle, I would recommend testing for HIV once a year, for reassurance. But don't lose any sleep over it. With your current sexual practices, you are at no risk of HIV. 

This being your fourth question along these lines, let's make it your last. As implied in my opening comments, we discourage repeated questions on the same topic or exposure, sometimes to the point of deleting questions without reply (and without refund of the posting fee).  I suggest it from compassion, not criticism, and to reduce temptations to keep paying for questions with obvious answers. In addition, experience shows that continued answers tend to prolong users' anxieties rather than reducing them. Finally, such questions have little educational value for other users, one of the forum's main purposes. Thanks for your understanding. 

HHH, MD

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26 months ago
Hi Dr Handsfield,

Thanks for your prompt detailed response. Really appreciate it. :)Just to clarify, i did not use condoms while receiving a  blowjob , however i used a condom while giving a blowjob , which was about two or three times this year.
Just one final question,  since the bj was deepthroat but with a condom, would it have neen possible for the condom to have torn withiut be knowing it? 

Thanks
H. Hunter Handsfield, MD
H. Hunter Handsfield, MD
26 months ago
It's hard for me to imagine you would have missed it if the condom had broken. For transmission from mouth to penis, if the penile partner is infected, the same CDC estimate came up with 1 in 10,000. That's equivalent to giving BJs, without condoms, to infected men once daily for 27 years before transmission might be expected. So whether or not the condom failed really doesn't matter.

Let me reiterate what I implied above:  for sex between two men, ONLY anal sex is a significant risk for HIV. Not oral sex, not kissing, not fingering.
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