[Question #5328] Scared after receipt of brief MSM oral sex

24 months ago
Hi. 8 Days ago I received brief (probably 20-30 seconds, although maybe longer) from a man I hooked up with on Grindr. He was clean, smart and friendly (I know this means nothing). He had no obvious sores or bumps on his mouth. I woke up in a panic the morning after convincing myself that I have caught something. I have been in touch with him and he has been very open saying that he and his partner (male) were both fully tested, including throat swab, 2 months ago and that he has never had an oral STI. Again, it's hard to believe a stranger. I have had absolutely no symptoms, but looking online has created a huge anxiety and I can't eat it sleep. I contacted a doctor at the local STI clinic on Tuesday and described the encounter and other details as above and she said there was no obvious risk. Unfortunately this didn't help and I sent off a urine test today. I'm absolutely convinced that I've contracted gonorrhea. Maybe it's due to guilt as I'm in a long term relationship. I just feel hopeless now and that I've ruined my (and her) life with one drunken stupid decision.
24 months ago
Also, he said he has not been with anyone else since his test, but it's plausible that his partner has and has infected him in the last 2 months.
Edward W. Hook M.D.
Edward W. Hook M.D.
24 months ago
Welcome to the Forum. I'll be glad to comment and hope that my comments, along with your lack of symptoms and the assessment of the other physician you spoke with will help to resolve your concern.  Regarding your partner, most persons tell the truth and his history, including the detail about past testing is plausible.  In addition. acquisition of infection through receipt of oral sex, IF your partner was infected, is unlikely- most exposures do not lead to infection.  Further, when infections occur following oral sex they are more often symptomatic than not, particularly gonorrhea, within 3-5 days following exposure.  I'm confident that the test you took will be negative.  

I urge you to not worry, to believe your test results when you get them, and to stay off the internet.  Much of what is said on the internet is out of date, taken out of context, or just plain wrong.  

I hope these comments are helpful.  EWH
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24 months ago
Thank you for the quick response Dr. The thing is, I know you're right and the rational part of my brain knows it. Unfortunately it's the irrational side that's taken hold. So you genuinely don't think I was at risk and that my test will be negative? 
I understand that "most" men show symptoms, but that obviously implies that "some" men are asymptomatic and it's this that is worrying me. I guess I'm so deep in my anxiety that only a negative test result will calm me. 
Edward W. Hook M.D.
Edward W. Hook M.D.
24 months ago
Your concerns, as you mention, reflect your anxiety and, I suppose, guilt. Well over 95% of men with urethral gonorrhea are symptomatic  I am not a betting person and would bet a very large mount that you are not infected.  All I can say beyond that is that you need to get hold of yourself.  EWH---
24 months ago
I'm trying my best. I'll try to stay offline until I get my results on Monday or Tuesday. I'll post the outcome here.
24 months ago
Ok, so you were spot on, doctor.  My tests came back fully negative. Rest assured, this whole debacle has been a real wake up call for me about just how important my relationship is to me. I will seek professional help about my mental state and why I was even tempted to stray.  Thanks for the help.
Edward W. Hook M.D.
Edward W. Hook M.D.
24 months ago
Thanks for sharing your result.  I am glad things worked out and agree with your plan going forward.  

This thread will be closed shortly.  Take care.  EWH
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24 months ago
Do I need to worry about syphilis? I saw no sores and has said since that he has none. Is it safe to continue sex with my partner? What are the chances of getting syphilis following my encounter, realistically?
Edward W. Hook M.D.
Edward W. Hook M.D.
24 months ago
 Your risk of syphilis is very very low. I would not worry. 

 And of thread. EWH 
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