[Question #5905] HIV anxiety, requesting help

18 months ago
exposure - I had a handjob at an asian massage parlor, sucked her nipples and touched her vagina with my fingers around 30  days ago. 

I thought it was a no risk even and forgot about it and had sex with my partner 10 days after the incident. She started complaning about few days ago about suddenly getting tired and diahherea. I started having regular cough every morning. That kicked in my anxiety and I had couple of tests. HIV RNA and HIV 4th gen both were negative on 14th day and 28th day.

Is there a chance that infection doesn't show up in my tests but still transmitted to my partner and infected her? Sorry if that was a dumb question and also is there chance that am actually infected but it didn't show up in  my tests since 4 weeks was too early? Can you please explain whether there is a chance for the virus to get transmitted to other but doesn't show up in primary host?


H. Hunter Handsfield, MD
H. Hunter Handsfield, MD
18 months ago
Welcome back to the forum, but I'm sorry you found it necessary.

Here is your own statement toward the end of our discussion last week:  "I had no risk, even if I had risk irrespective of exposure and scenarios my combination of RNA and 4th gen test is 100% conclusive on the 21st day(3 weeks)." That summary remains true. In addition, you now describe such testing at both 14 and 28 days. You could not have caught HIV and your test results show you did not. Therefore, HIV cannot be the cause of any symptoms you or your partner have now or may develop in the future. Further, neither your nor your partner's symptoms are typical for a new HIV infection, which does not cause cough; and although it can cause diarrhea, that plus "feeling tired" never would be the only symptoms. She has some other problem, perhaps a minor gastrointestinal virus. And no, it isn't possible for your partner to have caught HIV that didn't show up in your own testing.

If you remain concerned, I suggest you re-read your previous thread, which has more detail about why you can be sure you don't have HIV. If you remain anxious despite this disucssion and that one, professional counseling would be a consideration. My guess is that the main psychological issue is that you are conflicted or ashamed of a sexual decision you regret. Deal with that as you need to, but don't confuse those feelings with infection risk. They aren't the same.

I hope these comments help you move along without worry. Let me know if anything isn't clear.

HHH, MD
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18 months ago
Thanks for the answer Dr.

I understand there is no chance for my partner get infected with HIV since it didn't show up in my tests at 28 days ( which is 100% conclusive because of combination of RNA and 4th gen tests) and am not infected. Thanks again Dr.HHH
18 months ago
Is my above statement 100% correct. No chance for her to get since my test didn't show that and 28days is conclusive
H. Hunter Handsfield, MD
H. Hunter Handsfield, MD
18 months ago
Yes, you correctly understand. Did you think I might have changed my mind? Please do not keep asking the same question:  the answer of course will not change! Suck it up and move on.---
18 months ago
Thanks Dr. I will try to
18 months ago
Also any chance if other STDs from my exposure 
H. Hunter Handsfield, MD
H. Hunter Handsfield, MD
18 months ago
Nope.

That concludes this thread. Please note the forum does not permit repeated questions on the same topic or exposure. This being your second, it will have to be your last one; future new questions about this exposure, HIV and other STDs will be deleted without reply and without refund of the posting fee. This policy is based on compassion, not criticism; it is designed to reduce temptations to keep paying for questions with obvious answers. Also, experience shows that continued answers tend to prolong users' anxieties. Finally, such questions have little educational value for other users, one of the forum's main purposes. Thanks for your understanding.

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