[Question #6300] Protected oral sex?

17 months ago
I've been reading many of your answers from medhelp.org about HIV & STIs. Thank you for helping us and I am hoping you calm my anxiety.

I engaged in a protected insertive oral sex with an escort with unknown HIV status and I am sorry for being too paranoid.

I brought my own condom and during the oral sex act, I saw she looked the condom a couple of times and I think she purposely sucked the condom out and replaced with hers from the stack. I ejaculated in that condom after about 10'

1. From what I've read, even with unprotected insertive oral sex, there is not a single report of HIV infection this way. Is it still valid?
2. If she intentionally poked a small hole in the condom (because she wanted to infect men???), would the pressure from her mouth press her blood-tainted saliva back through the hole and infect me?
H. Hunter Handsfield, MD
H. Hunter Handsfield, MD
17 months ago
Welcome. It's always nice to hear from MedHelp alumni. Thanks for your confidence in our services, and for reading similar questions and replies before asking your own.

But I have to say your username says a lot! Directly to your questions:

1) Correct:  to my knowledge, there has never been a scientifically proved case of HIV transmission mouth to penis. There have been claims by infected persons that's how they acquired HIV, but probably all or almost all in fact had other sources.

2) Your self-claimed paranoia sure shows up here. Just think it through logically. First, it is rare that escorts (expensive female sex workers by appointment) have HIV. If she had it and wanted to infect you, why would she choose a method that she knows would work no more than one time in a million? (If that.) And how common is "blood tainted" saliva? Further, saliva kills HIV -- which probably is aprt of the reason that exposure to oral sex carries little or no risk. Finally, how successful do you think she could be in forcing her saliva through a pin-pricked condom?

No risk, no worries, and no need for testing for HIV or any other STD.

I hope these comments are helpful. Let me know if anything isn't clear.

HHH, MD
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17 months ago
Dr. Handsfield,

Thank you for clarifying and a good lesson. I know that I've been being very paranoid and I truly hate myself for that but don't really know how I can change. I really tried but I just can't :). That big "what if?" and put myself in the worse case scenarios do hurt me, I am in late 40s now, I really hope that some days I can overcome that I live stronger. Thanks again and God bless you.
H. Hunter Handsfield, MD
H. Hunter Handsfield, MD
17 months ago
I'm no psychologist, but I do know that nobody with this problem ever can fix it themselves just by trying, willpower, etc. Professional counseling is needed. You should consider it. I suggest it from compassion, not criticism.---
17 months ago
Thank you Dr. Handsfield.
H. Hunter Handsfield, MD
H. Hunter Handsfield, MD
17 months ago
You're welcome. I hope the discussion has been helpful.---