Welcome back to the forum. Thanks for your kind words and confidence in our services.
I reviewed your recent discussion with Dr. Hook and agree with all he said. I'll go directly to your current questions.
1) The best method to assure that neither you nor your partner has HSV is for you both to be tested. It is true that the tests aren't perfect, which is why most experts don't recommend tesing asymptomatic persons after single exposures. However, this situation is different, and HSV testing often is done in this situation. Of course you would have to deal with the statistical likelihood that one or both of you will test positive for HSV1, since roughly half the adult population has it; and with the much lower but still real possibility of an an uncertain HSV2 result that requires additional testing to sort it out. OTOH, if neither of you has had particularly high risk sexual lifestyle or symptoms potentially suggestive of herpes, you may decide against it -- probably something to discuss with your partner and not decide entirely on your own. A lot of people don't care much if they get genital herpes, knowing that most cases are mild or even entirely asymptomatic; that effective treatment is available in the event of significant symptoms; and in a committed relationship, there no longer a concern about informing partners and its impact on dating, romance, etc.
2) Correct on all counts: protection against future exposures, with no effect on current HPV infections or past exposures; and highly effective in preventing the oral HPV infections that rarely lead to throat cancer. Of course that's such a rare cancer, even without immunization, that if that were the only problem with HPV, probably nobody would have felt the need or invested the resources to develop a vaccine.
3) All your understandings are correct. The only possible minor modification is that we really don't know what proportion of people with asymptomatic HSV2, detected by blood test, and who do not recall symptoms of an initial infection, in fact had symptoms at the time that they forgot or that were so mild they paid no attention. However, we have also said that people who are particularly anxious about herpes probably are more likely to notice mild symptoms. Therefore, my belief is that those most concerned about having herpes are probably the ones who need worry least about it, if they haven't had symptoms. Experience in STD clinics teaches that most people are in fact quite blase about all genital symptoms, including those of herpes. Probably only a small minority are all that concerned -- although of course those persons are greatly overrepresented on forums like this, where you can easiily get the false impression that everybody worries a lot about all this stuff. Which simply isn't the case.
4) Finally, your fourth question confirms that you're probably in the group of more anxious persons than normal. Most people would never think to a) worry about mutual masturbation at all or b) attempt to observe their partners' genitals for lesions. I can't comment on the possibility that yesterday's partner had a "razor burn", but even if that was a herpes lesion, you were not at risk. Hand-genital contact rarely if ever transmits herpes or any other STD.
I hope these comments have been helpful. Best wishes-- HHH, MD