[Question #668] worried

54 months ago

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first, hi and thank you for youre service.i'm 34 male, married, lives in israel.for the last mounth i had some crisis about my life. so i thought its good time for new experiences.from knowing my personality i knew that high risk encounters will make me too worried.its turn out that i mistake, even those low risk exposures  made me real anxiety. i don't know if i need to be worried or not. hope you can help me figure if those acts put me at risk:i had 4 or 5 times encounter with transexual prostitues, those didn't include penetrative sex or oral sex, just touching and running, except one time that transexual gave me protected oral with condom.except those, the last exposure is the one that make me worried from all:before week i had an encounter with lady who gave bdsm services, she told me she is'nt doing sex with clients at all.  she penetrate me with strap on (she used condom and some lube...) and she enterd her fingers to me (she used single use latex gloves), she gave me to  sniff poppers - she said it will make the pentrate less pain.the poppers make me a little dizzi. at some point i asked her to stop cause all this encounter wasn't fun for me. so she suggest to give me massage. while i was on my stomach she spill some liquied to my anus area  and it make me some real burning. i asked her why she's do that and what is this - she show me bottle of perfume and saying se use it for disinfection and beacuse my hairs in that area torn of when she used the strap on i had a little bleeding. i saw that bottle, and for sure it was perfume - but all those wierd acts - poppers, spilling this without permision made me feel insecurity about her - maybe she done other things and didnt noticed cause the poppers influence or something...i shared my thoughts with her and she said she's always doing the maximum to keep her clients safe and for evidense she showed me the condoms she used on the strap on and the latex gloves.... she thought my fears are wierd....the facts are kn
54 months ago
the facts are - i'm really woried now, dont know if i had some risk, dont know if it is safe to make love with my wife,
i understand those acts at the last month are not matched to my personality.
i would like you to answer my questiones and share with me if you think i need to test for hiv
H. Hunter Handsfield, MD
H. Hunter Handsfield, MD
54 months ago
Welcome to the forum. Thanks for your question.

You did nothing that risked HIV or other STDs. There was no penetrating sex -- and that's really all that matters. Touching, including applying perfumes or disinfectants to the anal area, don't transmit such infections. That these events are unusual for you or "not matched to [your] personality" doesn't make the risk any higher. And it sounds like your last partner is generally safe and probably does not have HIV -- most people, including sex workers, don't usually lie when asked directly.

Therefore, from a medical or risk standpoint there is no need for HIV testing. However, you could do it if you want the additional reasurance of a negative test result. (This doesn't mean I really believe there was risk. I do not. Strictly something to consider if you want additional reassurance.) In the meantime, you can safely continue unprotected sex with your wife.

Let me know if anything isn't clear. Best wishes--  HHH, MD


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54 months ago
thanks a lot! that's help.
I didn't wrote that for few days I'm a little sick. 
Green nasal, cough, normal fever...
I thought those can be due to ars. guess you're opinion will not be changed, and I really rely on it.  but just to be sure, like to know if those symptoms can due to ars.
thanks again! now I feel much better.
H. Hunter Handsfield, MD
H. Hunter Handsfield, MD
54 months ago
No worries:  ARS doesn't cause nasal discharge or cough. You caught a cold.

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