[Question #6727] Bissexual fears

65 months ago

Hello doctors! First, I'm sorry for my English, I'm doing it for the google translator. Congratulations on the work. I’ve been following you since medhelp and now here on this forum. But I never asked a question, I never had the courage to think that all the answers have already been answered.

I am bisexual and sometimes I go out with male escorts. I have never had receptive anal sex, and I test myself for hiv and sexually transmitted diseases every 6 months. My last test was a month ago and everything was negative.

15 days ago I was with a male escort boy, and here's what we did:

- deep kiss, with tongue

- insertive anal sex with a condom (I inserted my penis in it)

- I received oral sex on my penis

- rimming in both directions

My biggest doubt is that reading your opinions at different times and for different people I get some questions. One guy here on this forum was advised to always use condoms for oral and anal .... another was advised that if he does not have penetrative anal or vaginal sex he can be calm about hiv ... another was advised to test ...

Anyway, my biggest fear is in relation to rimming, where I am afraid that eventually some blood may come in contact with my tongue (I think this is impossible for a transmission) or in some injury in my mouth (but it is true that the hiv was out of the body does not infect more?)

In this last meeting I had drunk a little more. I took courage and called the boy and asked: Did we do something without a condom? He replied: Are you crazy? I don't fuck without a condom! You fucked me with a condom, then I wanted more and I didn't have another one. I took my things and left.

I just want to have a possible sex life, without fear, and with security. As I do not have penetrative sex without a condom in any instance, nor do I put a penis in my mouth, I would like to know in which situations I could be concerned with HIV specifically.

Thank you for taking the time to do this!

Edward W. Hook M.D.

65 months ago

Welcome to the Forum and thanks for your confidence in our service, as well as your commitment to safe sex. Correct and consistent condom use for all penetrative sex should prevent you from acquiring both HIV and other STIs. For non-penetrative sex, including sex there is little risk for infection. I think the best way to answer your question is to list each sex act and tell you of what sort of risk is associated with that act when it is unprotected, both for HIV and for other STIs (there are some differences):

Kissing- There is no risk for HIV from kissing of any sort even if your partner has blood in their mouth or dental problems. There is a controversy currently as to whether you can acquired oral gonorrhea from kissing with our Australian colleagues believing this is an efficient means for gonorrhea transmission. Most experts however are doubtful that this is a major means of gonorrhea transmission.

Rimming – no known risk for HIV. The comments related to gonorrhea from kissing MAY be applicable to rimming as well however neither of us has ever seen or heard of a person acquiring an STI from giving or receiving rimming.

Insertive rectal intercourse- about the same risk for acquisition of HIV and STIs as vaginal sex.

Receptive rectal intercourse- The highest risk sex act for HIV acquisition.

I hope that this information is helpful. If not, please use your up to two follow-ups for clarification. EWH

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65 months ago

Thank you for the quick response! I understood, therefore:

1 - If I maintain this posture in relation to men and women (only anal and vaginal sex with condoms, do not let any penis enter my mouth, and continue with unprotected rimming, masturbation, and kisses) do I not need to test myself for hiv?

2 - A more technical question and I don't want to include this in the "what if" questions, because what I'm looking is understanding the risks to protect myself: If, and only if, I put my tongue in contact with some amount of blood (obviously that I didn’t feel it in kisses or in rimming), that wouldn’t be a risk because once HIV is out of the body it can’t infect. It would have to be a lot of blood coming straight into a big wound or inflammation. Am I right?

I won't even ask if I need to test after my report, because I must already imagine that your answer is no.

It is really difficult to live with so much confusing information! Glad we have this space for better guidance!

Edward W. Hook M.D.

65 months ago

1. With correct and consistent condom use and no condom failures, I see no need for regular HIV testing

2. You are correct. Ingestion of blood from an infected person is not a known risk for HIV.

You are correct. I see no need for testing related to the exposure you have described. EWH

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65 months ago

I would like to thank you for this conversation. I will always keep using condoms for anal and vaginal sex (never receptive) and I will allow myself to kiss, practice rimming and mutual masturbation without worries - exclusively for HIV.

One last thing for you to know, and you can also possibly share with your colleague Dr. Hunter Handsfield ... if you want, of course:

- Do you know why people keep asking and asking the same things, since they have read enough in other conversations or other topics? Because it is very comfortable to read an individual response, things calm down and gives credibility. There are people who are compulsive, yes, but not by choice. In addition to the serious medical work developed here, I don't know if you know, but I would add that they are doing a great psychological help in the face of so many agonies and doubts from the world population about Hiv infection. Congrats!

It was a pleasure, and I promise to follow your advice!

Edward W. Hook M.D.

65 months ago

Thanks for your thanks. We do appreciate that some clients ask repetitive questions for their own reassurance. Others do so to find out if things have changed in any way and, on occasion, they do. Our effort is to provide persons with personal reassurance and information. From your post, it sounds like we have for you and I am pleased at that. Take care. Stay safe.

This thread will be closed shortly. EWH

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