[Question #6957] Herpes Transmission

9 months ago
I have had type 2 herpes for about 15 months now. 
On daily viral suppression. Only had 2 outbreaks since diagnosed and it was before I was on daily meds. 

Dating someone new since acquiring  herpes and am really scared I will give it to them. We are not sexually active. I am planning to let him know I have herpes next time we see each other. 

I take my meds, take care of my overall health and will not have sex if I felt an outbreak was coming
on.  

What else can I do to prevent from transmitting it to him?  I am really scared about even without symptoms I could transmit it to him. 

How should I explain it to him since there is a chance I could be shedding the virus and not have symptoms?

Thank you. 
Terri Warren, RN, Nurse Practitioner
Terri Warren, RN, Nurse Practitioner
8 months ago
You could explain it just as you have here - "before we become sexual, there is something I need to share with you....."  If he uses condoms and you take daily antiviral medicine and you don't have sex with outbreaks and you have sex about twice per week, the chances of him getting this is about 1-2% per year.    If he has sex with someone who has herpes but doesn't know it (that's 80% of those infected), they will be doing nothing to reduce the risk of transmission because they don't know they should be doing something.  You, on the other hand, are aware of your infection and can do good things to reduce the risk of transmission. 

Not every disclosure goes perfectly and if this is your first time, it could be difficult, but try to remember you are no less worthy of love than someone who doesn't have herpes.  We all bring some not ideal attributes to relationships.  This might be yours.  I'm sure he has his share.  Hold your head up high.  You didn't choose this, and it isn't who you are.  Its something that you have.  Big difference!

Terri
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8 months ago
Thank you for the information. Do you have any transmission information about if a monogamous couple do not use condoms and the person with herpes takes their meds and does not have sex during outbreaks?
Terri Warren, RN, Nurse Practitioner
Terri Warren, RN, Nurse Practitioner
8 months ago
If condoms are not used, the transmission rate from female to male is probably around 2-3%.

Terri
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