[Question #702] risk of performing oral sex on male possibly infected.

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101 months ago
Hi there. I am new to the site. In a new relationship with a man who said he has not been with anyone in a while, since his ex wife. He recently admitted he has had a few unprotected vaginal sexual encounters with other women from dating sites recently. We only had oral twice, no other kind of sex. Both times he ejaculated in my mouth. The second time, I noticed a while later I had a raw area in my gums, probably from something I ate . HIV is my main concern. Is this still low risk even with my raw area in mouth or does that raise the risk? As well, should I be concerned about syphilis, chlamydia and gonorrhea and have testing. My apologies if this is a repeat question... I was only seeing questions about receiving rather than giving.  Thank you. 
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H. Hunter Handsfield, MD
101 months ago
Welcome to the forum. Thanks for your confidence in our services.

There is little or no risk for HIV in this situation. The chance a partner like yours has HIV is extremely low, assuming you are in the US or other industrialized country and that he doesn't have sex with men or use drugs by injection. And if he were infected, oral sex is safe sex; the average risk of HIV transmission by fellatio, penile to oral with ejaculation in the mouth, is somewhere around 1 in 10,000. In theory, the risk might be slightly higher in the presence of oral sores or inflammation, but not enough to be an important consideration. All in all, for practical purposes there is no chance you have acquired HIV.

The chance he has syphilis is as low as for HIV. Gonorrhea and chlamydia a bit higher, but probably unlikely. Chlamydia rarely infects the oral cavity, although gonorrhea can do so.

Your wording "new relationship" seems to imply you anticipate it will continue. If so, I suggest you frankly but sensitively discuss your concerns with him, and that both of you be tested for common STDs, incluidng HIV, syphilis, gonorrhea, and chlamydia. You may find he is as concerned as you are about STD risks, depending of course on your own sexual history. Even if you consider yourself at no risk, it can't hurt to be tested, and such testing is quite common in couples in new relationships. Assuming all results are negative in both of you, it probably will take a load off your mind.

I hope this has been helpful. Let me know if anything isn't clear.

HHH, MD
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101 months ago
Thank you so much.  I will be asking him to go for testing with me for peace of mind. He definitely does not inject drugs and says he has never been with a man. We are in Canada. Thank you again. I appreciate the reassurance. 
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100 months ago
As a follow up question, is there a big risk of HPV on the mouth or HSV2?  They don't do those tests routinely.  As part of my yearly routine,  I will be having the other tests but am curious about HPV and HSV2. I currently get occasional outbreaks of HSV1 on the mouth but not 2. Thanks so much.
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H. Hunter Handsfield, MD
100 months ago
Oral infection with genital types of HPV can occur but is about one tenth as common as genital infection. Oral HSV2 also is uncommon. And when either one is present, generally they produce no health consequences (no symptoms, no warts, no outbreaks) and are not transmitted to partners. Therefore, virtually all experts agree that tests for such infections should not be done, or only in special circumstances. Neither of them is worth any worry or concern.

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100 months ago
Thanks again for the reassuring answer. Much appreciated. 
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H. Hunter Handsfield, MD
100 months ago
Glad to have helped.---