[Question #752] Unsafe encounter without penetration

52 months ago
Hello Dr, 

So it seems i have made a big booboo. 

Last week i went to a spa center to get a massage, long story short, when the massage ended, the masseuse offered an "extra" for an additional 100 usd ( yeah i know its expensive ) 

Now, she took off all her clothes, put lotion all over my body and hers, slept over me and put my penis between her thighs and started rubbing. 
At some point, our genitals may have touched (not sure though) but mainly this has been avoided, also i am not sure if some fluids from her vagina has touched my penis. 
All in all, no penetration has been done and my penis did not enter her vagina nor anus. 
I should maybe also add that i am circumcised. 

My questions are: 

. Am i at risk of some sort of STD ? or worse yet HIV ? 
. Should i be worried about anything ? 
. Should i stay away for some time from my family in order not to infect them ? 

Needless to say that i am a bit worried about this, its the first time i do such a thing and i am not sure if the regret feeling or the disgust is making feel sick. 

Thank you, 
The booboo man
Edward W. Hook M.D.
Edward W. Hook M.D.
52 months ago

Welcome to the Forum. I'm pleased to comment.  Your "booboo" is not as big as you seem to be worried about.  With no penetration there is no (SEXRO) risk for the most common STIs including HIV, gonorrhea, chlamydia, trichomonas, etc.  These infections are ONLY transmitted through penetrative sex.  From a theoretical (and I emphasize, THEORETICAL) perspective there is a tiny risk that IF she had genital herpes, and IF she had active shedding of the virus (like from a lesion) then there would be a tiny (less than 1 in 1000) risk for acquiring herpes.  But that risk is truly tiny and there is no realistic reason for concern or anything that you can do about it.  Thus, my advice to you is:


Am i at risk of some sort of STD ? or worse yet HIV ?
NO, there is no meaningful risk in the events you describe.

. Should i be worried about anything ? 
No, I would not worry and there is no need for testing of any sort.

. Should i stay away for some time from my family in order not to infect them ?
No, nothing that you did puts anyone in your family at any risk

I hope my answers are helpful.  Please don't worry.  You will be fine.  EWH
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