[Question #7580] What are my risks in these two events ?

3 months ago
Hello Doctors,

After finally putting my last event behind me, I wouldve never thought I would be in the same shoes after experiencing so much anxiety and sadness the last time, but here I am again worrying about my stupid choices. I hope you can bring some insight and help me put these irrational fears away.

10 day ago I visited a massage parlor, received an unprotected handjob by an asian masseuse. She had her clothes on the entire time. Did not touch herself at all. From what I remember she only used lube and oil, no saliva at all.

What risks does this put me in ?

Also 3 days ago I went to a strip club, towards the end I received protected oral, condom was on from start to finish. Nothing else occured, event lasted no more than 4-5 minutes, I did ejaculate, but when I did so my penis wasnt even in her mouth if that even matters, after I finished with the stripper I went to the restroom to clean up and checked for any rips on condom, and even cleaned the condom before I took it off. Condom was intact. My mind keeps repeating this specific event and even though I know the condom was intact, I always get that what if I didnt check it good enough, what if I missed a spot, but im pretty sure I wouldve noticed if it was ripped right away. One thing to add, and what has me most anxious is after I took off the condom, I noticed my penis was pretty beat up after a couple unconfortable lap dances from other strippers, especially my glans, it was really red, and there was a cut/burn somewhere towards the middle of my glans and one towards the bottom, I also had another cut/burn towards the shaft of my penis. I am certain these were caused by friction from the lap dances. It was especially sore the next day, It is still noticeable to this day but is healing, I also noticed I am having lower abdominal pain, and mild testicular pain the day after.
This isnt the first time I experience this pain, and I would guess it is from stress, anxiety. 

1. What risk if any did I put myself in from this event ?

2. Do the cuts and bruises elevate the risk of catching an std, lets just say in case her saliva made its way there ?

3. What should I test for ?

4. Should I abstain from unprotected sex with my wife ?

5. What could cause such pain in that area ? Last time I had this pain was about 2-3 months ago, and all my tests were negative. Could it be coincidential, or it be due to anxiety or stress towards the situation ?
Edward W. Hook M.D.
Edward W. Hook M.D.
3 months ago
Welcome back to the Forum. I’ll be glad to comment.

Each of the events you describe were no risk events.  I’m not the least bit surprised that your penis was a bit inflamed following your encounters.  Friction is a part of sex.  In answer to your specific questions.

1.  None.  No one has ever acquired HIV from the sorts of exposures you describe.  Checking is not necessary.  When condom fail it’s obvious.
2,  no.  Superficial abrasions and cuts of the sort you describe do not change your risk.
3.  Frankly, I see no medical or scientific reason for testing of any sort.  Any tests you perform will be negative and are only for your own peace of mind.
4.  No.
5. It difficult to determine the origin of your abdominal and testicular discomfort without the optometrist take a full history and examination.  I encourage you to see your PCP.  Kidney stones are a possibility but there is no substitute for a thorough evaluation by your own doctor 
I hope these comments are helpful. EWH 

3 months ago
Hello Doctor,

Thanks for your quick response. I have a few more questions.

1. Regarding the first event even though it was just a handjob, I did not have a condom on. Would that still warrant as a no risk situation for all stds ?

2. I agree with you that sex can make your penis look worn out for a while maybe a day, but I had open cuts on my glans and shaft which could of possibly been bleeding, does that change anything, if per say saliva would of gotten up there.

3. HIV isnt my only concern , do you believe I am clear from all STD's ? I know Dr. Hansfield said protected oral carries little risk, but he didnt specifically say zero risk nor did he deny it was zero risk. Would both of yall agree on the response you gave me ?

4. Would your assement of changed in the protected oral if it were not protected at all ? From what I know unprotected oral does carry some risk of catching something right ?

I just dont want to put my wife at risk from yhis situation, but dont want yo go with the dreadful wait of getting tested if you believe I dont have to and can just carry on.

Edward W. Hook M.D.
Edward W. Hook M.D.
3 months ago
Straight to your follow up questions:
1.  Mutual masturbation is a no risk event.  Condoms are not needed.
2. No, the occurrence of cuts and abrasions are expected and do not change my assessment.
3.  We would agree.  Please don’t worry.
4.  There is a small risk for other STIs from receipt from unprotected oral sex, Gonorrhea in particular.  In the absence of symptoms, I would not worry.

3 months ago
Thanks again for the quick response, I know this will be my final answer, and I just want to sum things up.

1. How clear is a torn condom ? Does the whole thing just rip in one piece, therefore you say I wouldve noticed it.

2. I had asked you that I was worried about every std there was, you state that I should be clear from all of them and should not worry about testing for any of them ?

3. You mentioned that if it were unprotected there would be a slight chance of a possible std risk, but since my encounter was protected , then I shouldnt worry ?

4. Are there any stds that cause abdominal pain and mild testicular discomfort, especially just 24 hrs after the encounter ? Same with the abrasions, lets just say they werent caused by friction, would an std appear in such matter and only 24 after the encounter ?

5. my final question, I may sound repetative, but am I 100% free to move on with life , without worrying of putting my wifes health in danger, and any symptom will not be whatsoever be related to such encounters ? 
3 months ago
Sorry doc, I think I was unclear on my second question, I meant to say should I presume I am clear from all stds, and thus do not require testing for any of them, including the most common ones like gonnoreah and chlamydia ?
3 months ago
Doctor I also wanted to add that I do have genital hsv1, does this add any risk to the protected oral encounter ?
Edward W. Hook M.D.
Edward W. Hook M.D.
3 months ago
Straight to your final questions, mostly for verification of earlier responses:
1.  When condoms fail they break wide open leaving no doubt that they have failed. Typically the penis is fully exposed. Condoms do not develop small, pinhole leaks when they fail. 
2.  Correct, I see no reason for concern about any STI from the exposure you describe and no reason for testing. 
3.  Correct, no reason for concern.
4. STI’s do not become symptomatic within 24 hours of exposure. The micro organisms need time to multiply to cause symptoms.
5.  I see no reason whatsoever related to the encounter you describe. I encourage you to move forward with your life without concern.

Please look at my response number two for your follow one question. As I said no reason for testing for any STI including Gonorrhea and Chlamydia.

The fact that you have genital HSV-1 does not change my assessment or recommendations in any way.  

As you mentioned earlier this will be my final response. This thread will be closed shortly without for the responses. Take care. Please don’t worry. EWH