I hope you are doing well. 

I have some questions about how to approach telling someone about my HSV-1 status.

I had my first genital HSV-1 breakout almost three years ago, and to date it is the only breakout I've had. I'm pretty sure I contracted it from oral sex with my ex-boyfriend who has oral HSV-1. 

On January this year I started seeing someone casually. We have been friends with benefits since and have sex regularly. I have not told him about my status yet, since I know that HSV-1 disclosure is more about trust than transmission and I'm very picky with who I disclose this information with. I know that, due to the fact that I've only had one outbreak almost three years ago, I only shed around 4 days of the year, and that the chances female-to-male transmission are much lower than male-to-female. Furthermore, my "friend" and I use condoms about 97% of the time (there have been two instances of no condom, plus a couple of times that the condom slipped off). To top it all, I have been on daily suppressive therapy (500mg valtrex daily) since I started seeing him, even though I know this is really not necessary for HSV-1 and my doctor advised against it. However, I decided to start taking it because I knew that if I ever were to disclose to him I would like to be able to reassure him as much as possible. 

In the past month we've been getting closer and I'm thinking about disclosing to him soon. I would like to have some advice from your side on how to approach this. I know that I've been keeping him safe, so I really want to emphasize this. I also would like to give him the facts, so if you have resources for this that would be amazing. Just any advice you could give me would be very welcomed. 

Thank you in advanced!!!

 That could be a challenging conversation.  The very good news is that you are extremely well informed about your situation.  The other good news is that you've been doing everything you need to and can do to protect him.  Good for you.   And you have the facts!  You are right on target with everything that you know.  You can also let him know that not all experts agree about disclosing ones genital HSV 1 status.  Do you know if he has ever had a cold sore himself?  If he happens to be positive for HSV 1, then there is no worry here.  When you have the discussion, you might want to encourage him to get a test as 70% of those infected with HSV 1 don't have symptoms that they recognize as herpes. 

Will you let me know how it goes?

Terri