Sexual History: sexual intercourse / oral sex only with my wife for last 17 years. Before that (17 years +): a few female sexual partners but only mutual masturbation; oral sex; naked frottage. Only other sexual contact in the last 17 years = hand/arm contact with my penis in a massage context on several occasions.

Have experienced some balanitis on and off over the years (redness or smegma, but never any sores/cysts that I've noticed); normally clears up quickly on its own or with some anti-fungal/bact and/or steroid creams. Experienced again recently. Got better after 3/4 days of anti-fungal/steroid cream, but then recurred. Also saw a small area/line of inflammation about 1.5cm x 0.5 cm under foreskin below glans; with what almost looked like whiteheads. Went to the urologist. He was unsure and said it looked like it could be a post-herpes sore, which shocked me. He said though he couldn't be sure. Took a swab for bacteria/fungal infection; urine test; herpes antibody test. I explained my sexual history and he said it could have been dormant for many years and many people are unaware they even have it. He seemed quite unconcerned. He prescribed a cold sore cream which I am using. Urine test is clear but still waiting for culture test and other results and feeling anxious. I don't see how it is possible to be herpes. I looked online and from the images it's really hard to tell the difference between herpes/other spots/sores. Also, I never noticed any scabbing on that area.

I am hoping the tests will all be negative. But then I read that the tests are not always clear?

Is this likely to be herpes? How is it possible to have caught it? If it is, would my wife also already have it after 17 years? How can I confirm a diagnosis and what should I do to be responsible going forward? Is it possible to have acquired it from someone's hands in a massage setting?

Oh that is just ridiculous.  Ridiculous!  This isn't likely to be herpes at all unless it is HSV 1 herpes from your wife giving you oral sex at some point in your marriage.  Does she get cold sores - ever?  Do you? 

I think some health care providers are oblivious to what patients think and feel when they mention the word herpes.  They drop it like fungus or bacteria but it's completely different when patients hear it (and when patients have it).  If he had done a very thorough and meaningful discussion of your sexuality, he would known this very likely wasn't the usual HSV 2 infection and likely not HSV at all. 

I'll be interested in your antibody test results and also in what tests they ran.  It should be an IgG though there area better tests you can get done if you have trouble accepting a negative result, if you get a negative result.

you don't get herpes from a massage parlor unless you are getting your penis massaged by someone's mouth or genitals.  Not their hands! 

Let me know when you get test results.  I'll help you sort through them.

Terri

I got a call from the clinic. The swab taken came back as positive for Candida and I have been prescribed an anti-fungal cream now, which I presume means that Herpes is no longer a concern. 

There is still some irritation/redness in that area but it is better than it was; however, perhaps the Aciclovir cream I had been given before also has an anti-fungal effect?

They tested me for HSV 2 only it seems. Results as follows.

This is an all-clear for the symptoms that you were experiencing at the time.  I can't say much about your HSV 1 status except to say that about half the adult population in the US is infected with HSV 1.  I wouldn't worry for a second about acquiring it from a masseuse's hand.

Terri