[Question #821] Risk of HIV or STD from fingering a vagina and sucking nipples?

51 months ago
Hi there
On a recent trip to a southern state in Mexico a lap dance turned into me rubbing her clitoris with one hand and fingering her (in and out) with the other. I also kissed and sucked her nipples whilst doing this. I had a small self inflicted bite wound from earlier that day that had recently been lightly bleeding on the corner of the thumb of the hand fingering her. I don't recall that it was bleeding during this action. I just can't remember if my thumb had any contact with her - I remember it being mainly my middle finger and possibly one other in and out. Do I have any risk from either HIV or other STDs? I have been driving myself mad with worry over possible HIV or STDs exposure and thinking how stupid I was putting myself in this sort of situation with excessive alcohol. Should I be tested?
H. Hunter Handsfield, MD
H. Hunter Handsfield, MD
51 months ago
Welcome to the forum. Thanks for your question.

No worries at all here. They call certain infections sexually transmitted for a reason: you have to have sex to transmit them. And that does not include fingering, any other hand-genital contact, or contact of any kind with non-genital skin, including breasts and nippes. Small wounds on the fingers etc make no difference; still no risk. For STD transmission purposes, sex ONLY means intercourse or, less commonly, oral sex. For sure you are not at risk for any STD and should not be tested, and should continue unprotected sex with your regular partner without worry. 

I hope this has helped. Let me know if anything isn't clear.  Best wishes--

HHH, MD
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51 months ago
Thank you Dr Handsfield for your comments. Can I just be clear that had any vaginal fluid on my hands contained HIV or other viruses, that these would have been destroyed when my hand was exposed to the air and any fluid had dried up? I noticed when I woke up the next stay that I had a small scratch on one of my eyelids that had bled a little - no idea where it came from. I also noticed that I must have picked at some blister type skin on my toe at some point when I got back to my hotel some time later from the club and it had bled. A little worried that I had in a bit of a drunken state done this with the same hand as I had used to finger the stripper and some virus could remain under my nails or on hands. I'm sure you rule all this out with what you say below but i would welcome the re-assurance.
H. Hunter Handsfield, MD
H. Hunter Handsfield, MD
51 months ago
I can't say whether HIV or other infectious agents "would have been destroyed" if exposed to air. Probably. But the important fact is that even the busiest HIV and STD clinics never see patients whose only exposures were like yours. We know infection doesn't occur from such events. The biological reasons don't matter. And for the same reasons, little nicks and cuts on the hand make no difference. You were not at risk, period -- truly nothing to worry about.

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51 months ago
So to be clear and so that i can put this to bed for good, there could have been HIV or other STDs from her vaginal secretions on my fingers that could have still been 'alive' and whilst I may have somehow scratched my eyelid some time after the event and an hour or so later picked at a blister on my toe that bled quite a bit before bed (I believe with the same fingers that I used on the woman), there is no chance of these viruses having infected me and I should stop worrying about having HIV and STD tests and move on?
51 months ago
Sorry I meant to  add HIV or STD viruses not just being on my fingers but active under my nails when I must have scratched my eyelid and picked at my toe an hour or so after the finger event. There was quite a bit of blood released from the picking of my toe. I understand I might be sounding a tad over anxious. I'm looking forward to starting a family soon and whilst I could live with the consequences of my foolish actions I could not bear passing a thing on to my wife. Hence the anxiety over whether to take an HIV and general STD test.
H. Hunter Handsfield, MD
H. Hunter Handsfield, MD
51 months ago
You came here for professional advice and, presumably, reassurance. I've done my best, but you seem to be working hard to convince me that you are at risk anyway. But this isn't a debate. If you already decided you are at risk, why did you ask the question in the first place? Feel free to get tested if it will make you feel better. But there is no additonal information you can provide that would change my opinion or advice, and I can genuinely tell you that if somehow I were in your situation, I would not get tested and would continue unprotected sex with my wfie without worry.

That completes the two follow-ups included with each new question, and so ends this thread. Best wishes.

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