[Question #8668] HIV/STD fear, freaking out
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41 months ago
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Hello, I am 19M. Feb 26, I did unprotected oral sex with a girl from tinder (in Estonia). She (19F) was drunk while giving me oral sex and puked to my penis. Tomorrow we meet up again and had protected oral and vaginal sex. It was my first-time sex experience ever. I did not have any information about HIV/STDs due to lack of sex education at school. After 2 days from sex, my friend informed me about possible stds and hiv. I decided to search on google and learnt a lot. After learning tho, the tip of my urethra became sensitive, I could see a bit redness, It was tingling all the time. It is like someone is putting needles. I did a test on march 10 for DNA trachomatis, gonorrhoeae, vaginalis, genitalium. All came back negative, but the tingling in the tip of my penis remains. Although the penetration was protected, 3-4 days ago I had a huge cystic pimple on the shaft of penis where the condom don't cover. The cyst popped with bloody puss, but the skin was not fully healed i guess its still purplish the area of cyst. I guess HIV can pass through that damaged skin because of vaginal fluids, I noticed some little blood as well from her vagina . I also ejaculated in her vagina with condom, but condom did not break and I checked it with water . it remained intact but not the area of damaged skin. I have been extremely anxious since then. But right now I developed a bad sore throat and some muscle pains. It is hard for me to swallow. I talked to the girl on march 10 and brought her to lab for HIV test. She tested negative. The test was in Estonia Synlab. It was called. HIV 1/2 AB+AG p24, I believe its 4th gen, and they took blood from vein. her results was negative after 4 hours (12 days from act). But what threats me if she was positive but tested in window period because of her past sexual partners (i believe its quite a lot)
1. can HIV pass through the damaged skin of a big cyst?
2. hiv cases are a lot in estonia which scares me she had hiv but in window period. is th
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41 months ago
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To clarify, the damaged skin because of popping a cyst was before the sex act. That cyst damaged my skin. I believe that damage might be a good way for hiv to transmit.
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H. Hunter Handsfield, MD
41 months ago
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Welcome to the forum. Thanks for your confidence in our services.
I'm sorry to hear of the issues you are having over your first sexual intercourse -- and also to hear how little prior education you apparently had about sex, including STIs. My first general comment is that your anxiety-driven reading has seriously misled you in some aspects. For example, even among the most sexually active persons (e.g. sex workers), most do not have transmissible STIs at any point in time; most exposures to infected persons do not result in transmission of the infection; and therefore it is quite uncommon to be infected after any single exposure. Of course it can happen -- but most people should not expect to need STI testing after every new sexual exposure or partnership. Also, condoms work! Having had only protected vaginal and oral sex, you really were not at significant risk for any important STI.
Perhaps most important, it is very clear you have no STI at this time. Your symptoms are not suggestive of STI -- rather, they are typical for the genitally focused anxiety many people feel after sexual exposures that worry them. Probably anxiety alone explains your penile "sensitivity", as well as your perception of "redness" in your urethral opening. In my experience with thousands of patients over 45 years, on professional examination, almost always there is no increased redness or other abnormality that can be observed by an experienced professional. And no STI causes the sort of pimple or cyst you had on your penis. And sore throat -- well of course all humans get sore throats from time to time. That also is not from HIV or any STI. That was a coincidence that had nothing to do with the sexual contacts you describe. In addition, the tests you had -- which you really didn't need -- are highly reliable and show you did not acquire any of the infections for which DNA testing was done. Finally, from her test results you know that your partner didn't have HIV when you had sex with her. The chance she was in the window period is exceedingly low.
Those comments should cover most of your concerns. To your numbered questions: 1) Yes, in theory HIV could be transmitted in this way. But you know your partner doesn't have it. And in case you're not aware, when a woman DOES have HIV, the chance of transmission from any one episode of UNPROTECTED vaginal sex is around once for every 2,500 exposures. That's why it can take several years before the spouses of HIV infected persons catch the virus themselves. 2) I'm not aware of HIV epidemiology in Estonia, but the fact remains that heterosexual risk remains low for any one exposure. Almost certainly you do not have HIV, or any other STI.
I hope these comments are helpful. Let me know if anything isn't clear.
HHH, MD
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41 months ago
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I had that cystic pimple Before sex, it was a big painful cyst that popped out and left damaged skin on the penis. The condom didn't cover that area during the sex. Idk why but the girl had so much vaginal fluid while sex, I am pretty sure that fluids touched the damaged skin of the cyst. I read online that HIV can pass through damaged skin. I have never developed a sore throat in 2-3 years. I hardly believe it is a coincidence. I believe the girl slept with many other people. Although the negative HIV result of the girl is reassuring, I just feel that she was on the window period.
1. How likely she can be on the window period. Do you have any past experience like this scenario?
2. When the damaged skin that cystic pimple left can be fully healed and not transmit any virus, it's been nearly 20 days since the cyst popped but still, the skin looks damaged.
4. What should I do in this case how early I can test for HIV?
I remain anxious all day thinking about the possible outcomes. What can I do to minimize my anxiety although psychology is not your field. I would like to rule out HIV from my life.
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H. Hunter Handsfield, MD
41 months ago
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Of course her vaginal fluids came into contact with the cyst. Even with condoms, vaginal fluids work there way inside, over the top. As long as the head of the penis and urethral opening are covered, protection against HIV is complete. In theory, skin breaks etc might increase the risk, but any such sins is trivial.
1. The chance she is in the window period is probably less than one in many million. Forget it.
2. It takes a while for healed skin to look normal. This doesn't raise the risk of HIV.
4. You should not be tested for HIV. But if you insist, about 3 weeks after the exposure, a standard antigen-antibody test (AgAb, "4th generation") will be about 90% reliable; and 100% reliable at 6 weeks
We are not psychologists -- all we can do is give the scientific facts and probabilities. The rest is up to you. If you remain anxious despite this reasoned, science-based reassurance, speak with your doctor -- or consider psychological counseling.
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41 months ago
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Hello again, I could not wait for 3 weeks thats why i decided to test today (18days post), ag+ab hiv1/2 and it was negative. i have a very sore throat and itchy rash in my back and i feel extremely fatigued during the day.
1. if my symptoms were because of hiv, would it still be negative because of window period?.
2. how reliable is hiv1/2 ag+ab test in synlab estonia (idk if you have any information about this lab), they dont send any hiv index value (exp, 0.56,0.67 and etc) making me think maybe it is just a rapid hiv test and they share negative results in the name of 4th gen.
3. i know that 18 days is not conclusive and not very reliable but is it at least a good sign?
4. considering she tested negative after 12 days of sex, i believe she sleeps around (pardon my language) a lot with guys. i met her on tinder and she wanted to have sex in the first day( she probably does it with other people).maybe she have hiv but basically in window period, thats why her test showed negative.
5. considering she is 19 yo and her neg result after 12 days how likely this transmission can occur?
i wouldnt be so anxious if i didnt have a damaged skin on penis while having sex and i saw a bit bleeding im not sure whether she was on period. im probably gonna test again on day 45 to make it conclusive but its a long wait.
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H. Hunter Handsfield, MD
41 months ago
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1,3) You probably have a cold, not HIV. The negative test is reassuring, but not proof. However, if your test is still negative 7 days after onset of symptoms, it proves that HIV is not the cause of those symptoms.
2) I am unfamiliar with Estonia and laboratories there but probably the same tests are used as in the rest of Western Europe. Most tests are associated with index values, but it's up to the lab whether or not to report the index values to patients. But the tests without index values also are highly reliable.
4,5) The large majority of women like this do not have HIV, and as I already said, the chance she is in the window period for HIV is no higher than one chance in many million.
In the 16 years of this and our preceding forum, with thousands of questions from people worried about an HIV exposure, nobody has yet reported that they test positive. You will not be the first. If and when that happens, almost certainly it will be from someone truly at high risk (like unprotected sex with a known infected partner, or someone exposed by anal sex with another male partner) -- and not a very low risk even like you had. And please stop focusing on the "damaged" skin of your penis. It made little or no difference in risk. You came to this forum for our honest advice, and presumably because you intended to trust that advice. Do your best to believe the science and move on without worry.
That concludes this thread. Please do not start another with the same questions. The answers won't change! Best wishes and stay safe.
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