I have been in a state of complete panic since since I exposed myself to not one but two people. Working in healthcare myself I know how stupid this was and would not have occurred without the alcohol. 

Hoping you can help me estimate my overall STI risk and whether or not PEP may be warranted here. Thanks in advance. 

Please don't be embarrassed or otherwise concerned! You'll never be judged or see any signs of criticism about sexual choices on this forum, assuming there is no overt coercion or harm. 

This seems to be an essentially zero risk event in terms of STIs, including HIV. While people of course can be dishonest, most people in settings like yours are truthful when discussing their sexual/STI behaviors and risks. For sure PEP is not warranted in this situation, and would not be prescribed by the large majority of STI/HIV experts -- even for patients who specifically request it. I would put the odds you were infected with HIV as well under one in several million. As for other STIs, it seems conceivable that the risks to the other couple might be as high or higher from you to them as vice versa -- especially if your "very rocky marriage" implies your husband may have other sex partners (and that you and he have sex together at least occasionally).

So I don't even see a need for testing for HIV or any other STI. Of course you could do that if the anticipated negative results would help reassure you:  many people are more reassured by test results than by professional opinion based on probabilities and statistics, no matter how expert the source. If you decide to go that route, the best approach would be for all three of you to be tested -- for the reason just stated, perhaps they're as concerned about STI risks as you are. If you go that route -- either on your own or with everyone tested -- I suggest limiting testing to the common treatable STIs (gonorrhea, chlamydia, syphilis) plus HIV. You are at far too low risk to be at all concerned about other tests commonly included in "comprehensive STI panels" (or similar terminology) offered by many laboratories, especially in their online promotions (i.e. things like HSV, hepatitis B and C, etc).

If all three of you are tested, it can be done now and you'll be done with it. If it's only you, a urine or vaginal swab chlamydia/gonorrhea test would be valid any time more than 3-4 days after the event. (Given your anal and oral exposures, rectal and throat swabs could also be done. However, it is rare to have either gonorrhea or chlamydia only at those sites, i.e. almost always genital infection also is present -- so vaginal or urine testing is sufficient.) HIV and syphilis blood tests would need to be delayed until 6 weeks after the event. No matter what testing strategy you choose, stay relaxed until you have the results. The chance of any infection is extremely low, assuming you've had a truthful story from the other couple. If somehow I were in your situation, I would not be tested at all and would continue unprotected sex with my wife without worry of infecting her.

I hope these comments are helpful. Let me know if anything isn't clear.

HHH, MD

Just for fun, here is a link to the one of the first research studies done that tested large numbers of patients for gonorrhea at all sites (genital, anal, pharyngeal) -- and found no isolated pharyngeal infections except in one or two whose only exposure was performing fellatio. That observation wasn't the main point of the study and isn't mentioned in the abstract, but note the authors:  https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/6771877/