I am a female and yesterday night I gave a male friend unprotected oral sex for a bit (not too long, and I didn't have his penis in my mouth for long either I think). He also attempted to finger me, except it hurt when he tried to put his finger in so I made him stop immediately - but he did rub around for a bit after that.

Thank you for your time again, I really appreciate it.

Most people do not have STIs and even when they do, most single exposures to an infected partner do not lead to infection.  In general, performance of oral sex is amongst the lowest risk sorts of sexual encounters there are. -certainly lower than the risk if unprotected genital-genital contact. And while the throat can be infected by the gonorrhea bacteria and, rarely chlamydia, this is relatively uncommon.   Infections due to other STI’s such as syphilis, HIV, and herpes are very, very rare.

I guess I am slightly concerned, since I do think he might be relatively promiscuous (he's said so before), and unfortunately don't know him deeply enough to tell whether he's safe or not/is lying to me. I guess I'll drop some random concerns:

3) I was slightly concerned about that patch of darkened skin with bumps on one of his inner thighs, which he told me was some form of ringworm he developed in the army back then. He told me it comes and goes for him and he found out by googling about it back then (probably 2 years ago?). I googled it myself a little, and I think it's jock itch. I was staring at it a little and from the dim lighting, I could sort of tell that it looked mainly like darkened skin with a couple of bumps on the left outer side of the patch. Should I be concerned about this?

Again thank you for your time, I really do appreciate it more than you'll ever know.

1.  Even if your panties were wet with genital secretions (his or yours), without penetration grinding (the medical term is "frottage") is a no risk event.  The same is true for fingering.  STIs are not transmitted during the transfer on one person's genital secretions to another during mutual masturbation.  All experts agree on this.  

2.  If you test, I anticipate the result will show that you are not infected.  As noted above, testing should be done from the throat with a swab, with the specimen sent for testing for gonorrhea and chlamydia.  We specifically recommend against blood tests for herpes as they all too often give falsely positive results.  If you wish to test for HIV or syphilis, this is a blood test which should be taken 4-6 weeks after your exposure.  

3.  The location of the bumps you describe would be a most unusual place for any STI but a common place for folliculitis or a non-STI fungal skin infection ("jock itch") which would not be transmitted through the contact you describe.  

EWH

From the experience I shared, do you think herpes is something I should be concerned about?

From reading some other posts on here to educate myself a little more, I also assume that gonorrhea and chlamydia are the "most likely" things to be concerned about over this encounter, am I correct? Would this still be a low likelihood though? And when should I test with the throat swabs if I do?

Also, what about HPV? I do remember taking 1 or 2 vaccination jabs for HPV back when I was 12 or so, if I remember correctly (I'm about 24 currently) however I'm not sure if that's valid or if it does protect me still. It was a school program thing, so I'm also not sure if it was Gardasil. Any thoughts on that? :)

Thanks again!

1.  Your risk of acquiring herpes from the exposures you described is very low. Genital herpes is not acquired through receipt of masturbation or frottage. With regard to the risk of acquiring oral herpes through your provision of oral sex to your partner, the risk is also low. For reasons that remain clear HSV-2 virtually never infects the oral cavity. If your partner had genial HSV-1, there is a less than 1% chance that you would acquire the infection if you do not already have HSV-1 as over 60% of the population does.  It’s just mentioned, over 60% of American adults have HSV-1 although less than one and five of them are aware of it or have a history of cold sores. Your risk of acquiring herpes from the exposure you describe is vanishing low and not something to worry about.

2.  You are correct. Find a way gonorrhea is the STI most commonly acquired through performance of oral sex. The risk of acquiring chlamydia infection is far lower than the risk of Gonorrhea.  Overall, your risk of acquiring either infection from the encounter you describe is very, very low. If you choose to test, as mentioned above, tests for Gonorrhea and chlamydia will provide conclusive results any time more than five days after your exposure.

3.  Congratulations on being vaccinated for HPV. Vaccination is strongly protective against acquisition of HPV. Further, oral HPV infections are relatively uncommon. I would not worry about acquisition of HPV from the exposure you describe.

Please don’t worry. This is a very lowerstick exposure. EWH