Im m, 37, and married. My wife told me back in mid-September 2022 that she was pregnant(w3). I received two hand jobs at a massage clinic in Denmark in same period or just before she told. The clinic is as I understand only providing hand to genital. Fully dressed. Also, fingers were around my anus area “entrance”. My concern especially goes around Syphilis as my wife is pregnant. But, as I read, any risk of syphilis can have fatal consequences. I know that hand to genital is very, very low risk, but still the fact that extremely low risk still exists concerns me. I did a test  9 Jan 23. Name of test was: INSTI Multiplex HIV-1 / HIV-2 / Syphilis Antibody Test. And a full blood/urin test from my own doctor 16 Jan 23. This showed also negative for all stds. Two things triggers my fear: I have been having what the doctor think is dermatitis behind my penis head from December until now (on and off). Red area with some inching and dryness (same spot). Secondly my wife is having a red spot on her belly that freaked me out, but doctors say its most likely 1 cherry angioma. But could this be a syphilis chancra on the stomach? And thus, I can’t let go despite doctors saying it is most likely not! The reason why my 2 negative tests don’t provide me with 100% comfort also leads to my question. 1) There could be a false negative outcome of my two tests?. 2) Could there be a case of me having “self-curred” the bacteria/syphilis over the 4 month without medicine, and thus testing negative for anti-bodies - despite being positive during and earlier stage and thus having transmitted to my wife?. 3) Can you be a “passive carrier” of syphilis without showing anti-bodies in testing? Still infecting my wife. Can I trust the testing 100% and thus no risk for here?

Also there was a hand to penis event in july 2022. Same scenario. This is all exposure. 

My wife was tested negative in october for all STDs in screening. 

And 6 events in 2021. Same place and only hand to penis - handjob. Always fully dressed masseuse. The events from the past is hunting me despite my testing. Could my body have self-curred me and therefore negative testing. But wife infected just after/post her testing in october 2022 - she had public screening for all stds and negative.

Welcome to the forum. I'm happy to address these concerns.---

Thanks doc. So there is not an scenario where i get syphilis in period of lets say 2020-2022, but not transmits it to my wife before post her testing in October 2022 (you are right she was tested negative). And then im self-curred in the period after her(my wifes) testing and thus the 2 test im performing january 2023 is both negative? Of course unlucky timing but could this "cross- testing scenario happen"? And if not why?  (we have sex 4-6 times per month) And could the small red spot on her stomach be primary syphilis cancra og secondary single rash only (Last questions). And thank you for the support!!

No, there is no such scenario. "And if not why?" Because it would have to involved several almost zero risk events all coming true. Most massage workers do not have HIV -- in your country, I would say the chance she had HIV was under one in a thousand. Then add one chance in say 100,000 it was transmitted by hand-genital contact, which has never been known to happen. Then the possibility your tests missed syphilis maybe one in a thousand. Then the possibility you infected your wife but her tests also remained positive -- let's guess one chance in a thousand. Statistically, this puts the possibility that your wife had syphilis, and could have passed the infection to the baby at 0.001 x 0.00001 x 0.001 x 0.001 = 0.00000000001 (if I've correctly counted the zeros). That's one chance in 100 billion. And even this is on the high side, since most of those numerical estimates probably are too high.---

Got it. And for this question: And could the small red spot in the middle on her stomach be primary syphilis cancra og secondary single rash only.

Oh come on. What exactly did you not understand with "There is no possibility that any additional thoughts that could come to your mind would possibly change my evaluation and advice"?---