Welcome back to the forum. Thank you for your continued confidence in our services.

Even without a condom, oral sex is quite safe. The risk isn’t zero, but the overall chance of STDs is much lower than for unprotected vaginal or anal sex, and the risk is zero for some infections, including HIV. The overall STD risk probably is about the same for condom-protected vaginal sex and for condomless oral exposure. In any case, you asked your “friend” to have incomplete testing. It’s fine to know she doesn’t have HIV or hepatitis B or C, but those all were essentially zero risk anyway. Depending on her sexual lifestyle, your greatest risk probably was for gonorrhea, and maybe for chlamydia if there was unrecognized condom failure. (Gonorrhea but not chlamydia can be transmitted by oral sex.)

Nevertheless, it is very unlikely you acquired any STD or infected your wife with anything. Your wife’s apparent urinary tract infection almost surely is exactly what it seems. Most likely the pending urine culture will confirm she has one of the standard causes of UTI, such as E. coli or similar bacteria. All in all, the greatest risk for your wife probably was gonorrhea, since it is the most common STD transmitted by oral sex. However, gonorrhea almost always causes obvious symptoms in infected men within 3-4 days:  absence of urethral discharge (“leakage”, as you put it) is strong evidence you weren’t infected.

At this point, I would just wait on your wife’s UTI culture result. If you want still further reassurance, you could consider a urine test for gonorrhea just to be that much more certain about it. (That would include chlamydia testing, almost always done automatically along with gonorrhea testing.) You can expect negative results.

I hope these comments are helpful. Let me know if anything isn’t clear.

HHH, MD